Monday, January 31, 2005
The rrrrrrisk we rrrrun.
" it's ok, " J assured me when he saw my crestfallen face. " I understand most ppl have misgivings about motorbikes."
We trudged along further while I held a raging debate within myself. My mind was telling me " Go for it babe!! You've never ridden a motorbike b4" But there was a tiny voice screaming in the back of my head.. " Mom will freak BIG time if she sees you on that thing."
In the end, i turned down J's kind offer and took the boring but less hair raising mrt train back. I guess i kinda regret foregoing the chance to race along the roads on a motorbike but i know my mom would never forgive me if i had hopped onto that seat.
You might say that thousands of ppl ride motorbikes everyday they arrive at their destinations unscathed. . J's been riding for some time and he did give another of our BFyouth members a lift to Jurong earlier that day. THey both arrived in one piece. Wat made me say no? I guess I am still pretty shaken from witnessing the car accident at Bedok 2 weeks ago where a car swerved into a motorbike, flinging the rider off his seat and right into the pavement beside the road. The terrifyingly loud bang and the sight of a flailing and helpless human body sailing through the air as an unwilling victim of gravity and Newton's laws served as an alarm bell to curb my craving for a ride on the bike. THe fact was that if that motorbike had been a car, the injuries inflicted would probalby have been less severe. It's a hard cold fact that bikes generally offer less protection to their riders. And i guess i didn't want my mom to worry.
My dad probably would have disapproved but I doubt he would have hit the roof. After all, he had a motorcycle license once. And my dad has an appetite for risk taking and adventure ( He called my mom once and asked her if he could go sky diving .. LOL.. no prizes for guessing her rxn.
The notion of wearing a helmet and roaring down the expressway with the wind whipping watever's left of my hair post helmet , plus cool dude thrown in sounds pretty exhilerating. But I assessed the risks ( including that of going deaf if my mom finds out) and made my decision. Call me a paranoid, boring ole biscuit.. but i 'd like to play things safe.
" it's ok, " J assured me when he saw my crestfallen face. " I understand most ppl have misgivings about motorbikes."
We trudged along further while I held a raging debate within myself. My mind was telling me " Go for it babe!! You've never ridden a motorbike b4" But there was a tiny voice screaming in the back of my head.. " Mom will freak BIG time if she sees you on that thing."
In the end, i turned down J's kind offer and took the boring but less hair raising mrt train back. I guess i kinda regret foregoing the chance to race along the roads on a motorbike but i know my mom would never forgive me if i had hopped onto that seat.
You might say that thousands of ppl ride motorbikes everyday they arrive at their destinations unscathed. . J's been riding for some time and he did give another of our BFyouth members a lift to Jurong earlier that day. THey both arrived in one piece. Wat made me say no? I guess I am still pretty shaken from witnessing the car accident at Bedok 2 weeks ago where a car swerved into a motorbike, flinging the rider off his seat and right into the pavement beside the road. The terrifyingly loud bang and the sight of a flailing and helpless human body sailing through the air as an unwilling victim of gravity and Newton's laws served as an alarm bell to curb my craving for a ride on the bike. THe fact was that if that motorbike had been a car, the injuries inflicted would probalby have been less severe. It's a hard cold fact that bikes generally offer less protection to their riders. And i guess i didn't want my mom to worry.
My dad probably would have disapproved but I doubt he would have hit the roof. After all, he had a motorcycle license once. And my dad has an appetite for risk taking and adventure ( He called my mom once and asked her if he could go sky diving .. LOL.. no prizes for guessing her rxn.
The notion of wearing a helmet and roaring down the expressway with the wind whipping watever's left of my hair post helmet , plus cool dude thrown in sounds pretty exhilerating. But I assessed the risks ( including that of going deaf if my mom finds out) and made my decision. Call me a paranoid, boring ole biscuit.. but i 'd like to play things safe.
Saturday, January 29, 2005
*pouts* c'mon lz, surely my seduction skills are better than that (sieves thru lingerie acquired at work) i'm sure i'll find smth good..
whoa gal, i'm impressed :P *kneels down* wo bai ni wei shi! yeah, He did teach that our attachment to all things impermanent is one of the reasons why we suffer. where did you read that from? i'm still pretty unsure about the stuff about self and non-self tho' mebbe i'm juz lazy to contemplate on it whoopz. if you like Buddhist books which are more light reading, read Ajahn Brahm's books. the BFellowship has free distb copies. that guy has a good sense of humour, making his works very lighthearted and easy to comprehend and practise.
WANNa CuPpA??
Never give out your hotmail address, even if it's for the purpose of business. I was so horrified when a sales executive whom i called up during work to discuss quotations with actually added me onto his Msn. I mistook his nick as one of my old classmates' nick and added him. Next thing i knew , he was trying to get me to go for coffee.
Him: I owe you a coffee.
Me: er. i'm a miserly little secretary with not much say in the matter. thanks but no thanks
Him: how about juz around your work area?
Me: i'm allergic to coffee
Him: tea?
Me: " i'm allergic to all drinks offered by you in general"
okok i didn't say that. here's the more politically correct ans.
Me: i'm allergic to caffiene in general !!
i have very few "reject lines " available, mebbe coz the no. of times i've been picked up amounts to less than wat i can count off using the fingers on my right hand.
Here are some that are available from the top of my head in case you're stuck in a sticky situation...
" if you try that again, i'll get my 105kg bf to personally rearrange your face,"
or you could try rather self depreciating ones:
" Nah, coffee ain't a good idea, I am thinking of going on a diet, since the doc says that my BMI equals to that of an overweight mammoth and i'm at risk for heart disease in the future."
" Coffee ain't very good for the teeth. Mine are already the colour of the Singapore river. "
" Sure! not many ppl would offer to buy a castrated male a cuppa!"
or the best yet
" I would appreciate if you bring a peppy chick along, then we can both oggle at her if we get bored."
i suppose the last one can be modified if your parents try to set you up during a family dinner.
looks at mom and dad seriously, " MOm, dad.. I've got something to announce ... i'm not straight!"
Cruel moi. hey, but love is a cruel thing aint' it? I was telling my fren, i either keep falling for the wrong guys, or the wrong guys keep falling for me. Not like there are many in the latter category. But i suppose i'm lucky. I've not been burnt too badly yet. I have hurt pple b4, and i've been hurt , but I've been fortunate not to have drowned too deeply in this sorrowful forms of human relationships.
One semester - so many broken hearts. I don't know all the stories, but i keep seeing so many ppl get hurt that i feel disgusted and disillusion with romantic love. Wat's love when it cozes so much suffering??
someone juz told me she was jilted. While i was ranting and raving at her situation, I noticed to my surprise that she was quite calm and collected about it. wat touched me most was her lack of anger and hatred. She told me that Buddhism had help her find peace within her self and the inability to hate her bf . She quoted the diamond sutra. " everything is like a dream, one mmt it's there, the other it's not, reflect upon the impermanence of things in this world" She told me she applied the 4 noble truths to cope. She accepted that her heart was in turmoil ( she was suffering), she looked at the issue of why she was suffering ( She was confused and upset) , she understood that she had teh power to brnig her suffernig to an end ( for she alone had that power to change her future) and she was going to have to set about ending her suffering ( she had to decide whether to let go or hold on) My first thots when I saw her were -- this gal is mad. How can she be so calm!!!!??? But then after I reflected and , I realised that she embodied the loving kindness and compassion that Buddha emphasized. She loved him so much there was no room for hatred in her heart. Hatred would only make her more miserable than she was. She was definitely hurting, as any sentient being would have, and she set aside a period to let her frustrations out.. but she didnt' hate him. The 3 poisons did not envelope her heart. wow!!! I'm ashamed at how long I hold grudges at ppl. I'm quick to anger, slow to forgive. Goodness, some of my grudges are like er.. 3 years old. I admired the way she could put Buddha's teachings to practise.
Understanding them is easy, lz and i agreed, but putting them into practise.. that's the hard part.
Our wise Rev Miao Yu counselled that tho' it's admiralbe to love someone sooo deeply, it is not advisable to give that person so much that you end up hurting yourself and other ppl. She told a story.
there lived this couple whoes marraige was on the rocks. The guy had an enormous sex drive that the wife coudlnt' satisfy. Desperate to hang on to her husband, she drugged a couple of call gals at teh bar, bundled them home to satisfy her husband's needs. She kept him by her side, but at teh cost of her sanity. There came a day when she could take it no longer and she ended up killing the gals that she had kidnapped.
You can love someone enough to give him your everything, but if you have to hurt yourself and other ppl in teh process, it really ain't a wise decision.
Love is not about possession, it's about giving and making sacrifices.
hope she will find her ans and happiness soon.
Hai.. love is soo cruel. You're sad loving someone, you're sad not loving someone. geez.
for me, happiness is sacrificing that cuppa cofffee..
Neway, Went to Fo guang shan last night. Thot it was some prayers thingy , turned out to be their annual dinner. Lol.. the food was yummylicious!!!! vegan steamboat and satay ! I met 2 of my Melb temple frens. SL was with her parents, she 's gonna living in singapore! And K. HAd a good time chatting with K, haven't seen her since we both returned.
whoa gal, i'm impressed :P *kneels down* wo bai ni wei shi! yeah, He did teach that our attachment to all things impermanent is one of the reasons why we suffer. where did you read that from? i'm still pretty unsure about the stuff about self and non-self tho' mebbe i'm juz lazy to contemplate on it whoopz. if you like Buddhist books which are more light reading, read Ajahn Brahm's books. the BFellowship has free distb copies. that guy has a good sense of humour, making his works very lighthearted and easy to comprehend and practise.
WANNa CuPpA??
Never give out your hotmail address, even if it's for the purpose of business. I was so horrified when a sales executive whom i called up during work to discuss quotations with actually added me onto his Msn. I mistook his nick as one of my old classmates' nick and added him. Next thing i knew , he was trying to get me to go for coffee.
Him: I owe you a coffee.
Me: er. i'm a miserly little secretary with not much say in the matter. thanks but no thanks
Him: how about juz around your work area?
Me: i'm allergic to coffee
Him: tea?
Me: " i'm allergic to all drinks offered by you in general"
okok i didn't say that. here's the more politically correct ans.
Me: i'm allergic to caffiene in general !!
i have very few "reject lines " available, mebbe coz the no. of times i've been picked up amounts to less than wat i can count off using the fingers on my right hand.
Here are some that are available from the top of my head in case you're stuck in a sticky situation...
" if you try that again, i'll get my 105kg bf to personally rearrange your face,"
or you could try rather self depreciating ones:
" Nah, coffee ain't a good idea, I am thinking of going on a diet, since the doc says that my BMI equals to that of an overweight mammoth and i'm at risk for heart disease in the future."
" Coffee ain't very good for the teeth. Mine are already the colour of the Singapore river. "
" Sure! not many ppl would offer to buy a castrated male a cuppa!"
or the best yet
" I would appreciate if you bring a peppy chick along, then we can both oggle at her if we get bored."
i suppose the last one can be modified if your parents try to set you up during a family dinner.
looks at mom and dad seriously, " MOm, dad.. I've got something to announce ... i'm not straight!"
Cruel moi. hey, but love is a cruel thing aint' it? I was telling my fren, i either keep falling for the wrong guys, or the wrong guys keep falling for me. Not like there are many in the latter category. But i suppose i'm lucky. I've not been burnt too badly yet. I have hurt pple b4, and i've been hurt , but I've been fortunate not to have drowned too deeply in this sorrowful forms of human relationships.
One semester - so many broken hearts. I don't know all the stories, but i keep seeing so many ppl get hurt that i feel disgusted and disillusion with romantic love. Wat's love when it cozes so much suffering??
someone juz told me she was jilted. While i was ranting and raving at her situation, I noticed to my surprise that she was quite calm and collected about it. wat touched me most was her lack of anger and hatred. She told me that Buddhism had help her find peace within her self and the inability to hate her bf . She quoted the diamond sutra. " everything is like a dream, one mmt it's there, the other it's not, reflect upon the impermanence of things in this world" She told me she applied the 4 noble truths to cope. She accepted that her heart was in turmoil ( she was suffering), she looked at the issue of why she was suffering ( She was confused and upset) , she understood that she had teh power to brnig her suffernig to an end ( for she alone had that power to change her future) and she was going to have to set about ending her suffering ( she had to decide whether to let go or hold on) My first thots when I saw her were -- this gal is mad. How can she be so calm!!!!??? But then after I reflected and , I realised that she embodied the loving kindness and compassion that Buddha emphasized. She loved him so much there was no room for hatred in her heart. Hatred would only make her more miserable than she was. She was definitely hurting, as any sentient being would have, and she set aside a period to let her frustrations out.. but she didnt' hate him. The 3 poisons did not envelope her heart. wow!!! I'm ashamed at how long I hold grudges at ppl. I'm quick to anger, slow to forgive. Goodness, some of my grudges are like er.. 3 years old. I admired the way she could put Buddha's teachings to practise.
Understanding them is easy, lz and i agreed, but putting them into practise.. that's the hard part.
Our wise Rev Miao Yu counselled that tho' it's admiralbe to love someone sooo deeply, it is not advisable to give that person so much that you end up hurting yourself and other ppl. She told a story.
there lived this couple whoes marraige was on the rocks. The guy had an enormous sex drive that the wife coudlnt' satisfy. Desperate to hang on to her husband, she drugged a couple of call gals at teh bar, bundled them home to satisfy her husband's needs. She kept him by her side, but at teh cost of her sanity. There came a day when she could take it no longer and she ended up killing the gals that she had kidnapped.
You can love someone enough to give him your everything, but if you have to hurt yourself and other ppl in teh process, it really ain't a wise decision.
Love is not about possession, it's about giving and making sacrifices.
hope she will find her ans and happiness soon.
Hai.. love is soo cruel. You're sad loving someone, you're sad not loving someone. geez.
for me, happiness is sacrificing that cuppa cofffee..
Neway, Went to Fo guang shan last night. Thot it was some prayers thingy , turned out to be their annual dinner. Lol.. the food was yummylicious!!!! vegan steamboat and satay ! I met 2 of my Melb temple frens. SL was with her parents, she 's gonna living in singapore! And K. HAd a good time chatting with K, haven't seen her since we both returned.
HH ah.. wah.. abandoned me for american idol.. *sulk* leave me heart broken.. fine .. *siddles up to lz and bats eyelids* " zheeeeeeeeeeeeen..!!!"
This Hope ah.. call me crazy.. wah piang. *grumble*
neway, it's gonna be a week of partings and sad happenings actually.
just found out HH's dog pogo passed away. :(
Just found out that mom's best fren's mother has a malignant cancer of teh bile duct which is gonna snuff out her life eventually..
HH is going back to glasgow,
juz reflected on the number of hearts breaking...
As I jogged in the park juz now, I caught side of a few old people being wheeled along in their wheelchairs. one adopted a catatonic position, another gazed blankly into thin air and the last one was trying to keep up with his caretaker.
Old age, failed love, sickness and death.
I admire the resilience of sentient beings tho' - the ability to love, the ability to find the strength to enjoy wat's left of one's transient life.
For despite all the pain that wrecked his body, pogo passed out of suffering into his next life, surrounded by the ppl he loved most.
For despite the cancer cells spreading like a plague throughout her body, the jaundice and the pain had left her and she had her filial daughter by her side..
For despite the effort of taking each agonising small step, the old uncle was still able to walk out every day to enjoy the fresh air in the park.
For despite the pain that came with parting, they could still cherish the good memories of teh past
I've seen the forms of suffering for myself in one week. Just like the Buddha saw the 3 signs. However, i have not the wisdom to truly comprehend the 4 noble truths. but i can see, that even in your darkess hour, you can always find the will and strength to deal with it and draw happiness from small little things .
I pray for them all, that they will come thru their ordeals and that the Dharma will be their guide.
This Hope ah.. call me crazy.. wah piang. *grumble*
neway, it's gonna be a week of partings and sad happenings actually.
just found out HH's dog pogo passed away. :(
Just found out that mom's best fren's mother has a malignant cancer of teh bile duct which is gonna snuff out her life eventually..
HH is going back to glasgow,
juz reflected on the number of hearts breaking...
As I jogged in the park juz now, I caught side of a few old people being wheeled along in their wheelchairs. one adopted a catatonic position, another gazed blankly into thin air and the last one was trying to keep up with his caretaker.
Old age, failed love, sickness and death.
I admire the resilience of sentient beings tho' - the ability to love, the ability to find the strength to enjoy wat's left of one's transient life.
For despite all the pain that wrecked his body, pogo passed out of suffering into his next life, surrounded by the ppl he loved most.
For despite the cancer cells spreading like a plague throughout her body, the jaundice and the pain had left her and she had her filial daughter by her side..
For despite the effort of taking each agonising small step, the old uncle was still able to walk out every day to enjoy the fresh air in the park.
For despite the pain that came with parting, they could still cherish the good memories of teh past
I've seen the forms of suffering for myself in one week. Just like the Buddha saw the 3 signs. However, i have not the wisdom to truly comprehend the 4 noble truths. but i can see, that even in your darkess hour, you can always find the will and strength to deal with it and draw happiness from small little things .
I pray for them all, that they will come thru their ordeals and that the Dharma will be their guide.
Monday, January 24, 2005
Just finished a very very busy weekend. i can't believe i lost my slippers after BF session. It was too amusing to be true. I just stood there chuckling , think auntie susan thot i was nuts. ah well, there go my 19 bux bata slippers which i liked so much. Funny how things you treasure tend to slip away when you least expect. Same with human relationships i guess. Letting go seems to be the only way to save ourselves from this suffering. like mew and i agreed.. sitting on the shelve seems to be the best way to save yourself from suffering. somehow getting yourslef involved with matters of the heart just seems to make life worst for you. heh. called me cynical,
Week? busy i suppose. met up with calvin ( who came down from KL), met up with qh n cowzy too. long time no see these pple.. so it was good catching up with 'em. i have to try to go another round and meet up b4 i leave.. urgh no time no time. and i'm seeing so little of my family!
Had this wonderful speaker for BF to speak on generosity and giving danna. He was sooo full of humour, it was a pleasure listening to him speak. THe morning's dharma session was a little uncomprehensible for me, coz it was about management in companies. didn't know we had such nice hymms too. :) tho' it ended a little karaoke style. Next week, BF is going for iceskating/science center trip. haha.. science center?/!! wonder wat we're gonna be doing there. argh, but have to study for BTT, . i've not even started lor.
just watched a stephen chow film. Chinese odessey : part 2. haha.. quite confusing .. but since i've a huge crush on chow, i don't give a damn. man, he 's so droolworthy in the show. ( i see jo rolling her eyes). c'mon, how can you not swoon at those lingering close ups in the show? ackackack. nvm, i've a serious desire to watch kungfu hustle again. grinz
Week? busy i suppose. met up with calvin ( who came down from KL), met up with qh n cowzy too. long time no see these pple.. so it was good catching up with 'em. i have to try to go another round and meet up b4 i leave.. urgh no time no time. and i'm seeing so little of my family!
Had this wonderful speaker for BF to speak on generosity and giving danna. He was sooo full of humour, it was a pleasure listening to him speak. THe morning's dharma session was a little uncomprehensible for me, coz it was about management in companies. didn't know we had such nice hymms too. :) tho' it ended a little karaoke style. Next week, BF is going for iceskating/science center trip. haha.. science center?/!! wonder wat we're gonna be doing there. argh, but have to study for BTT, . i've not even started lor.
just watched a stephen chow film. Chinese odessey : part 2. haha.. quite confusing .. but since i've a huge crush on chow, i don't give a damn. man, he 's so droolworthy in the show. ( i see jo rolling her eyes). c'mon, how can you not swoon at those lingering close ups in the show? ackackack. nvm, i've a serious desire to watch kungfu hustle again. grinz
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Wise words from the Buddha! ( taken from Buddhist Fellowship website)
DHAMMAVADAKA
Remember always that you are just a visitor here, a traveler passing through. Your stay is but short, and the, moment of your departure unknown.
None can live without toil, and a craft that provides your needs is a blessing indeed. But if you toil without rest, fatigue and weariness will overtake you, and you will be denied the joy that comes from labour's end.
Speak quietly and kindly and be not forward with either opinions or advice. If you talk much, this will make you deaf to what others say, and you should know that there are few so wise that they cannot learn from others.
Be near when help is needed, but far when praise and thanks are being offered.
Take small account of might, wealth and fame, for they soon pass and are forgotten. Instead, nurture love within you and strive to be a friend to all. Truly, compassion is a balm for many wounds.
Treasure silence when you find it, and while being mindful of your duties, set time aside, to be alone with yourself. Cast off pretense and self-deception' and see yourself as you really are.
Despite all appearances, no one is really evil. They are led astray by ignorance. If you ponder this truth always you will offer more light, rather than blame and condemnation.
You, no less than all beings, have Buddha Nature within. Your essential Mind is pure. Therefore, when defilements cause you to stumble and fall, let not remorse nor dark foreboding cast you down. Be of good cheer and with this understanding, summon strength and walk on.
Faith is like, a lamp, and wisdom makes the flame burn bright. Carry this lamp always, and in good time the darkness will yield and you will abide in the Light.
DHAMMAVADAKA
Remember always that you are just a visitor here, a traveler passing through. Your stay is but short, and the, moment of your departure unknown.
None can live without toil, and a craft that provides your needs is a blessing indeed. But if you toil without rest, fatigue and weariness will overtake you, and you will be denied the joy that comes from labour's end.
Speak quietly and kindly and be not forward with either opinions or advice. If you talk much, this will make you deaf to what others say, and you should know that there are few so wise that they cannot learn from others.
Be near when help is needed, but far when praise and thanks are being offered.
Take small account of might, wealth and fame, for they soon pass and are forgotten. Instead, nurture love within you and strive to be a friend to all. Truly, compassion is a balm for many wounds.
Treasure silence when you find it, and while being mindful of your duties, set time aside, to be alone with yourself. Cast off pretense and self-deception' and see yourself as you really are.
Despite all appearances, no one is really evil. They are led astray by ignorance. If you ponder this truth always you will offer more light, rather than blame and condemnation.
You, no less than all beings, have Buddha Nature within. Your essential Mind is pure. Therefore, when defilements cause you to stumble and fall, let not remorse nor dark foreboding cast you down. Be of good cheer and with this understanding, summon strength and walk on.
Faith is like, a lamp, and wisdom makes the flame burn bright. Carry this lamp always, and in good time the darkness will yield and you will abide in the Light.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
i dunno if it's just me or i think my neurons are dying in masses. can't follow simple instructions, can't recall things that jac has reitertated a thousand times, even after she just mentioned it 30 sec ago.. hai.
brain deteriorating. GIT is screwed as usual.
dunno wat happened. ate something wrong i think either that or stressed. horried stomach upset last week followed by gastric attacks every night since saturday. wtf .. *knocks stomach * " hellllooooo??? teh mechanism repaired yet???" stupid tablets don't work anymore. sigh. gulping them 2 at a time now. how to jian fei like this? i'm gonna look ilke a whale with extra blubber and a sore tummy. xianz..
ok. i shall bitch big time, if you dun wanna read it, just skip teh following section.
Living with gastric
IS A REAL BITCH!!!!!
whew.
i'm really kinda wondering how i'm gonna cope in hospitals next time.. yeah right. half way thru op.. " er. sir, i think i need to go and eat, otherwise, it's gonna be me lying on the table"
ok. dun feel like bloggin, too tired to do anything. think i have to go drink my milk and zzzzzonk. hopefully don't wake up at night again with the attack of the stomach again.. groan.
brain deteriorating. GIT is screwed as usual.
dunno wat happened. ate something wrong i think either that or stressed. horried stomach upset last week followed by gastric attacks every night since saturday. wtf .. *knocks stomach * " hellllooooo??? teh mechanism repaired yet???" stupid tablets don't work anymore. sigh. gulping them 2 at a time now. how to jian fei like this? i'm gonna look ilke a whale with extra blubber and a sore tummy. xianz..
ok. i shall bitch big time, if you dun wanna read it, just skip teh following section.
Living with gastric
IS A REAL BITCH!!!!!
whew.
i'm really kinda wondering how i'm gonna cope in hospitals next time.. yeah right. half way thru op.. " er. sir, i think i need to go and eat, otherwise, it's gonna be me lying on the table"
ok. dun feel like bloggin, too tired to do anything. think i have to go drink my milk and zzzzzonk. hopefully don't wake up at night again with the attack of the stomach again.. groan.
Monday, January 17, 2005
horrifying event no. 1
it was so surreal. Jo and I were walking to meet mom at the taxi stand, when a loud bang startled us. I turned around just to see a motorcylcist flung off his vehicle. It was a horrifying sight, watching a man helplessly sailing through the air and landing in a heap by the edge of the road. His vehicle was smashed, and metallic debris littered the side of the road. A group of passersby gathered at the taxi stand and gawked at the sight. I dumped poor jo with the bag and dialled for an ambulance. Coudln't even recall wat the no. of ambulance was. jo said it was 995. Mom said the guy tried to get up but collapsed again. I pray he is ok. That was a pretty hard hit. I wish i could be of more use.. but i would probably end up giving him a total lesion of the spinal cord than saving his life.
Horrifying event no. 2.
was in the mrt last tuesday. I was bursting to save the fire, so alighted at Kallang, and then boarded the train for Bedok. This Indian guy stood so close to me his hand brushed against my thigh. At first I thot.. aiyah, crowded lah, so i stepped back. But instead of withdrawing his hand and readjusting his position, this guy just kept coming lor. wah piang.. now his hand was in a place I don't even dare mention. My face burning, I shoved my way further in the car. The moment the train stopped at the next mrt, this asshole darted out, that's when i knew that he was really up to no good.
The problem with us gals accusing someone of outraging our modesty is that we need to be sure b4 we start yelling. in this case, this guy was obviously guilty but I coudln't have him caught because I wasn't even sure if it was just the lack of space or his devious intentions that cause him to touch me. Just a note to gals out there... wat i shoudl have done was looked at him straight in the eye and said "" Xcuse me sir, but do you mind placing your hands some place else, because I feeling fucking uncomfortable with you plastering them on my crotch.. " oh ok/.. " Because I feel uncomfortable " would suffice and draw attention to you and him and stop the outrage of modesty. But having said that, i can understand why most molesters get a way with it.. coz at that point of time, you're so confused and stunned to actually even scream out loud. Just be wary gals.. when you're in a crowded place, the guy huddling next to you may have less innocent intentions than just enjoying your personal space.
Now ( cracking knuckles) my dear mew, the below is an actual narrative.. not the one i wrote earlier. lol.. or i'll have to spend my next meeting with you debating wat narratives are.. :)
The familar form startled her the moment it caught her eye. Guilt and painful memories cruelly flooded her brain as she darted out of sight. It was all her fault. She was such a coward, a being unworthy of existence. she still couldn't summon up the courage to face it . She thought she had managed to burn all her bridges with it. She threw them all away, all those reminders that had collected in that short amount of time. She thought it would help her forget, but the ashes still fluttered around her, mocking her of the shocking blow she had dealt with one cruel message. She was sorry, but she held her head up high and her lips shut. Her pride kept the lie going.
whoo.. can feel my fingers flexed for narrative writing once again. but then again, i suck at narratvie writing. hmm. i remember i avoided it like plague after one disastrous essay. ah well. when i've the time and the inspiration, I shall set on expanding on this one.
and after all that sobz sobz.. and Eek Eek! Here's something that was a bright spark in my prev. week.
Nice peaceful mindblowing event no. 1
Had a zen master from Perth speak to BFellowship on Sunday. ( note: before anyone jumps into conclusions, BF = Buddhist fellowship. k? ) She was a very very excellent orator! I also heard Brother Lim speak of the Firefly mission to Myanmur. Brother Lim spoke with so much passion, I thot he was going to cry. wow.. I'm considering signing up on teh next mission.. i think it'll be an experience of a lifetime! I enjoyed prayer session ( tho' i was dreadfully late) . it was less rituals than Fo guang.. and more theravada inclined. More time was given for lectures and talks. I'm easing in easier with my BF youth group. Finally can recall some names.. haha.. Feels good to be among Dharma brothers and sisters who make practising and learning the Dharma so fun!!!! too bad had to go the hosp talk in the afternoon ( it was useful tho'.. ) had to miss BF .. hai. the zen master was talking again in teh afternoon. was looking forward to asking her qns in a smaller group. A bit unnerving posing qns in front of the whole congregation.
it was so surreal. Jo and I were walking to meet mom at the taxi stand, when a loud bang startled us. I turned around just to see a motorcylcist flung off his vehicle. It was a horrifying sight, watching a man helplessly sailing through the air and landing in a heap by the edge of the road. His vehicle was smashed, and metallic debris littered the side of the road. A group of passersby gathered at the taxi stand and gawked at the sight. I dumped poor jo with the bag and dialled for an ambulance. Coudln't even recall wat the no. of ambulance was. jo said it was 995. Mom said the guy tried to get up but collapsed again. I pray he is ok. That was a pretty hard hit. I wish i could be of more use.. but i would probably end up giving him a total lesion of the spinal cord than saving his life.
Horrifying event no. 2.
was in the mrt last tuesday. I was bursting to save the fire, so alighted at Kallang, and then boarded the train for Bedok. This Indian guy stood so close to me his hand brushed against my thigh. At first I thot.. aiyah, crowded lah, so i stepped back. But instead of withdrawing his hand and readjusting his position, this guy just kept coming lor. wah piang.. now his hand was in a place I don't even dare mention. My face burning, I shoved my way further in the car. The moment the train stopped at the next mrt, this asshole darted out, that's when i knew that he was really up to no good.
The problem with us gals accusing someone of outraging our modesty is that we need to be sure b4 we start yelling. in this case, this guy was obviously guilty but I coudln't have him caught because I wasn't even sure if it was just the lack of space or his devious intentions that cause him to touch me. Just a note to gals out there... wat i shoudl have done was looked at him straight in the eye and said "" Xcuse me sir, but do you mind placing your hands some place else, because I feeling fucking uncomfortable with you plastering them on my crotch.. " oh ok/.. " Because I feel uncomfortable " would suffice and draw attention to you and him and stop the outrage of modesty. But having said that, i can understand why most molesters get a way with it.. coz at that point of time, you're so confused and stunned to actually even scream out loud. Just be wary gals.. when you're in a crowded place, the guy huddling next to you may have less innocent intentions than just enjoying your personal space.
Now ( cracking knuckles) my dear mew, the below is an actual narrative.. not the one i wrote earlier. lol.. or i'll have to spend my next meeting with you debating wat narratives are.. :)
The familar form startled her the moment it caught her eye. Guilt and painful memories cruelly flooded her brain as she darted out of sight. It was all her fault. She was such a coward, a being unworthy of existence. she still couldn't summon up the courage to face it . She thought she had managed to burn all her bridges with it. She threw them all away, all those reminders that had collected in that short amount of time. She thought it would help her forget, but the ashes still fluttered around her, mocking her of the shocking blow she had dealt with one cruel message. She was sorry, but she held her head up high and her lips shut. Her pride kept the lie going.
whoo.. can feel my fingers flexed for narrative writing once again. but then again, i suck at narratvie writing. hmm. i remember i avoided it like plague after one disastrous essay. ah well. when i've the time and the inspiration, I shall set on expanding on this one.
and after all that sobz sobz.. and Eek Eek! Here's something that was a bright spark in my prev. week.
Nice peaceful mindblowing event no. 1
Had a zen master from Perth speak to BFellowship on Sunday. ( note: before anyone jumps into conclusions, BF = Buddhist fellowship. k? ) She was a very very excellent orator! I also heard Brother Lim speak of the Firefly mission to Myanmur. Brother Lim spoke with so much passion, I thot he was going to cry. wow.. I'm considering signing up on teh next mission.. i think it'll be an experience of a lifetime! I enjoyed prayer session ( tho' i was dreadfully late) . it was less rituals than Fo guang.. and more theravada inclined. More time was given for lectures and talks. I'm easing in easier with my BF youth group. Finally can recall some names.. haha.. Feels good to be among Dharma brothers and sisters who make practising and learning the Dharma so fun!!!! too bad had to go the hosp talk in the afternoon ( it was useful tho'.. ) had to miss BF .. hai. the zen master was talking again in teh afternoon. was looking forward to asking her qns in a smaller group. A bit unnerving posing qns in front of the whole congregation.
Saturday, January 15, 2005
of boobs, butts, bras, suffering and kids
This week was an interesting one. It started with me lamenting about my current rotting status on Monday. yez. i've actually been rotting for a month over. wowz!!! amazing. I figured.. Shit. i've to do smth about it.I coudlnt' find a job, so i kinda gave up on that one. inspired by my Bfellowship brother John, I decided to seek out an organisation to volunteer with. I scanned thru the website and called up some org., but the sad thing now is there are so many strings attached to the openings. You can't volunteer if you can't commit for at least 6 mths.So i was left out in the cold. Just as I was feelign dejected, i got a call from HH. turns out my old job agent Felicia was looknig for someone to take a job. Felicia called me soon after and to my pleasent surprise, I found myself getting 2 job offers in one day. HH also told me that the org. she was working with called yong en care center in china town was lookingf ro volunteers to give under priv kids tuition. So in just one day 's notice.. i found myself armed with both a job and a volunteer job. yay!!! So happy.
I working with ( drum roll) ... Triumph international ( i see raised eyebrows) no. i'm not measruing boob size. working as a marketing secretary. my "boss" Jac is really really nice. Kinda enjoy work even tho' it's mundane smtimes. She keeps feeding me.! argh.. growing fat :P But i swear that it's every guys' fantasy job. C'mon, the walls , calanders are just plastered with gorgeous gals scantily clad in their undies. ( can see lz shaking her head, yez it's so like dirty minded me to notice those :P ) I think any of my guy frens would give an arm and a leg to be working in here. LOL. it's an interesting experience seeing the inside of how this international business is runned.
Volunteer work: Yong en care center is a center set up by the Fairfield methodist church to help old ppl with dementia get some exercise and spend their time with frens. At night, tuition courses are run at a minimal costs for needy kids. I was tutoring pr 5 with HH that day. Had 4 charges.. 2 of whom drove me mad. haha..one of them was soo cheeky. the other just diam diam je.. and refused to do anything i asked him to. I can't figure out how to help them much , but i must say that cheeky as they are, they grow on you. The first day had no agenda so i was left to cough up some interesting activity for the kids to do. Fortunately i discovered that all the kids and me share the same passion for drawing. and the kids all love ghost stories. So i got them to write a short paragraph about their experience getting stuck in the lift. 2 wrote ghost stories.. 2 wrote more normal versions. All drew really really well. :) impressive. I'm no Aiyoyo lao shi, or Torey Hayden ( whom i desperately need now) .. hopefully i can really help these kids. My partner in crime HH had to relief teach pr. 4.
I can picture my frens raising eyebrows.. xl tutor kids??? hahahaha. yeah, i'm very infamous for my apparent lack of rapport with kids. I expect all of them to behave like my bro who is rather mature for his age.. ie.. act like a little adult. I supposed it was easier coz i was dealing with kids the same age as my bro, so i could sorta bond easier with 'em. Tutoring was tiring, but it was fufililng and it wasn't as much of a nightmare as i predicted it to be. :P
Actually i didn't know that so many volunteers were needed in spore. I hope to volunteer on a longer term basis when i'm back here in spore.for 1 year :)
Was reading the papers today about the aid distribution in Sri lanka and aceh. Apparently some religious groups were taking advantage of the situation to gain new converts. hai.. the big debate again. Ok.. this is a personal view, i won't declare it's the right one, so pls don't get offended. I think it's a little unethical to mix up relief work with religion. Even on missions overseas, regardless of tsunami or not. I feel religion is a choice you make when you're open to all options. Sometimes your circumstances force you to be dependent on external aid and this makes your mind a very vulnerable entity. It's awful when you 're denied access to medical care because ( i quote from the papers) you refuse to declare yourself a believer. One aid agency WorldAid wanted to place 50 orphans in it religious home because they wanted to convert the kids. Due to backlash from the community, it later withdrew its statement. I suppose the passion for their religion and the want to help spread is word drives the actions of these ppl. But take a step back and think like an athiest for once.. are you being fair to this ppl? Will the dead parents of the kids toss in their graves because if their kids have been forcibly extracated from the camps and exposed so zealoulsy to another religion that they have no choice but to adopt it as their own.? The papers mentioned that "several religious groups have used the situation to their advantage to recruit more members". Now, i'd like to commend religious groups for taking the initiative to help.. some are more sensitive to the issues, covering up religious symbols and helping the ppl regardless of race or faith.
I'm glad to see that Buddhism hasn't been mentioned yet by the papers ( perhaps there are such Buddhist group out there, i've no idea, i hope not tho' ) as one of those zealous group . Buddha did preach that faith is a choice made by men and regardless of whether he believes in the Dharma, it still applies to him, no one is condemned for not believing in the Dharma. BF has sent a team down on a Fire fly mission ( they were in the papers!!!!_)I'm glad to see my Dharma sisters and brothers working to elleviate suffering , I'm glad to know that they work out of compassion and loving kindness and not becuase they crave to recruit the sentient beings who don't believe in the Dharma. Craving is the root of suffering. Looking at Australia and how the Aboriginals were forced to abandone their culture to embrace the culture and religion of their invaders, I see how the wise words of Buddha apply.
so it was a very hectic week, but fufilling one. goodness, i didn't even get to eat dinner with my family for almost the whole week. I leave when it's dark, i come back when it's dark. heh. If only the talk at ttsh was today, coz i' was looking forward the whole week to Bfellowship. but i've to miss it for the talk. I guess i'll try serivce at the Bfellowship this sunday, then head to ttsh later.
This week was an interesting one. It started with me lamenting about my current rotting status on Monday. yez. i've actually been rotting for a month over. wowz!!! amazing. I figured.. Shit. i've to do smth about it.I coudlnt' find a job, so i kinda gave up on that one. inspired by my Bfellowship brother John, I decided to seek out an organisation to volunteer with. I scanned thru the website and called up some org., but the sad thing now is there are so many strings attached to the openings. You can't volunteer if you can't commit for at least 6 mths.So i was left out in the cold. Just as I was feelign dejected, i got a call from HH. turns out my old job agent Felicia was looknig for someone to take a job. Felicia called me soon after and to my pleasent surprise, I found myself getting 2 job offers in one day. HH also told me that the org. she was working with called yong en care center in china town was lookingf ro volunteers to give under priv kids tuition. So in just one day 's notice.. i found myself armed with both a job and a volunteer job. yay!!! So happy.
I working with ( drum roll) ... Triumph international ( i see raised eyebrows) no. i'm not measruing boob size. working as a marketing secretary. my "boss" Jac is really really nice. Kinda enjoy work even tho' it's mundane smtimes. She keeps feeding me.! argh.. growing fat :P But i swear that it's every guys' fantasy job. C'mon, the walls , calanders are just plastered with gorgeous gals scantily clad in their undies. ( can see lz shaking her head, yez it's so like dirty minded me to notice those :P ) I think any of my guy frens would give an arm and a leg to be working in here. LOL. it's an interesting experience seeing the inside of how this international business is runned.
Volunteer work: Yong en care center is a center set up by the Fairfield methodist church to help old ppl with dementia get some exercise and spend their time with frens. At night, tuition courses are run at a minimal costs for needy kids. I was tutoring pr 5 with HH that day. Had 4 charges.. 2 of whom drove me mad. haha..one of them was soo cheeky. the other just diam diam je.. and refused to do anything i asked him to. I can't figure out how to help them much , but i must say that cheeky as they are, they grow on you. The first day had no agenda so i was left to cough up some interesting activity for the kids to do. Fortunately i discovered that all the kids and me share the same passion for drawing. and the kids all love ghost stories. So i got them to write a short paragraph about their experience getting stuck in the lift. 2 wrote ghost stories.. 2 wrote more normal versions. All drew really really well. :) impressive. I'm no Aiyoyo lao shi, or Torey Hayden ( whom i desperately need now) .. hopefully i can really help these kids. My partner in crime HH had to relief teach pr. 4.
I can picture my frens raising eyebrows.. xl tutor kids??? hahahaha. yeah, i'm very infamous for my apparent lack of rapport with kids. I expect all of them to behave like my bro who is rather mature for his age.. ie.. act like a little adult. I supposed it was easier coz i was dealing with kids the same age as my bro, so i could sorta bond easier with 'em. Tutoring was tiring, but it was fufililng and it wasn't as much of a nightmare as i predicted it to be. :P
Actually i didn't know that so many volunteers were needed in spore. I hope to volunteer on a longer term basis when i'm back here in spore.for 1 year :)
Was reading the papers today about the aid distribution in Sri lanka and aceh. Apparently some religious groups were taking advantage of the situation to gain new converts. hai.. the big debate again. Ok.. this is a personal view, i won't declare it's the right one, so pls don't get offended. I think it's a little unethical to mix up relief work with religion. Even on missions overseas, regardless of tsunami or not. I feel religion is a choice you make when you're open to all options. Sometimes your circumstances force you to be dependent on external aid and this makes your mind a very vulnerable entity. It's awful when you 're denied access to medical care because ( i quote from the papers) you refuse to declare yourself a believer. One aid agency WorldAid wanted to place 50 orphans in it religious home because they wanted to convert the kids. Due to backlash from the community, it later withdrew its statement. I suppose the passion for their religion and the want to help spread is word drives the actions of these ppl. But take a step back and think like an athiest for once.. are you being fair to this ppl? Will the dead parents of the kids toss in their graves because if their kids have been forcibly extracated from the camps and exposed so zealoulsy to another religion that they have no choice but to adopt it as their own.? The papers mentioned that "several religious groups have used the situation to their advantage to recruit more members". Now, i'd like to commend religious groups for taking the initiative to help.. some are more sensitive to the issues, covering up religious symbols and helping the ppl regardless of race or faith.
I'm glad to see that Buddhism hasn't been mentioned yet by the papers ( perhaps there are such Buddhist group out there, i've no idea, i hope not tho' ) as one of those zealous group . Buddha did preach that faith is a choice made by men and regardless of whether he believes in the Dharma, it still applies to him, no one is condemned for not believing in the Dharma. BF has sent a team down on a Fire fly mission ( they were in the papers!!!!_)I'm glad to see my Dharma sisters and brothers working to elleviate suffering , I'm glad to know that they work out of compassion and loving kindness and not becuase they crave to recruit the sentient beings who don't believe in the Dharma. Craving is the root of suffering. Looking at Australia and how the Aboriginals were forced to abandone their culture to embrace the culture and religion of their invaders, I see how the wise words of Buddha apply.
so it was a very hectic week, but fufilling one. goodness, i didn't even get to eat dinner with my family for almost the whole week. I leave when it's dark, i come back when it's dark. heh. If only the talk at ttsh was today, coz i' was looking forward the whole week to Bfellowship. but i've to miss it for the talk. I guess i'll try serivce at the Bfellowship this sunday, then head to ttsh later.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
The King surveyed the fortress and frowned. His men's positions were very undesirable indeed. They had already suffered heavy losses from earlier attempts to breach the walls had failed. He was running out of strategies. His advisors told him to retreat before more lives were lost. He's mind and heart were at war with each other. The conflict betwen the 2 entities raged like a temptest that threatened to consume him.
Retreat!
The thought was very welcoming, but he could not face the disappointment that would follow his emptyhanded return. The land that lay beyond the stoney walls was rumoured to be rich, and his people would benefit greatly from the opportunities it promised to deliver. They needed it so...
He raised his weary eyes and took in sights of the camp. His men were tired. Their limbs ached with the constant strain of physical activity, their hearts pined for the familar pastures of their home, their eyes glazed over from seeing the horrors of war.
Retreat!
The thought was very welcoming, but he could not face the disappointment that would follow his emptyhanded return. The land that lay beyond the stoney walls was rumoured to be rich, and his people would benefit greatly from the opportunities it promised to deliver. They needed it so...
He raised his weary eyes and took in sights of the camp. His men were tired. Their limbs ached with the constant strain of physical activity, their hearts pined for the familar pastures of their home, their eyes glazed over from seeing the horrors of war.
Monday, January 10, 2005
Oh Buddha !
fill my mind with wisdom,
help me stand and see,
that the power to love and let go,
lies within me.
There is more suffering in this world,
than my silly litle problems,
This "ego" i perceive.
This entity that I call my body.
Shackled by my selfish desires.
help me let go.
help the ppl who cry let go of their pain
help the ppl who died find peace and rebirth yet again.
"you never know if you'll wake up tomorrow or in your next life," - Tibetian Buddhist saying.
" There were 2 Tsunamis... the 2nd one was the larger one.. the tsuanami of compassion." - Brother Lim from BFellowship
" Things are so impermanent... remember to treasure every single blessing you have. Apologise to your mom as soon as possible after a fight, you never know if you'll have that chance again," - Bfellowship group discussion
fill my mind with wisdom,
help me stand and see,
that the power to love and let go,
lies within me.
There is more suffering in this world,
than my silly litle problems,
This "ego" i perceive.
This entity that I call my body.
Shackled by my selfish desires.
help me let go.
help the ppl who cry let go of their pain
help the ppl who died find peace and rebirth yet again.
"you never know if you'll wake up tomorrow or in your next life," - Tibetian Buddhist saying.
" There were 2 Tsunamis... the 2nd one was the larger one.. the tsuanami of compassion." - Brother Lim from BFellowship
" Things are so impermanent... remember to treasure every single blessing you have. Apologise to your mom as soon as possible after a fight, you never know if you'll have that chance again," - Bfellowship group discussion
calorie count : sky high.
Action: snoozing on bed
supposed to go joggin today. After a long long delay ( raining the past few dayz everytime i step outt of the house).. but was sooo exhausted, i just landed on bed, shut my eyes and slept right till dinner time.. zzzonk.
shouldn't have slept so late last night.. dionk. was late again for service ( dionk dionk). so paiseh, walked in in the middle of the great compassionate repentence ceremony, stared blankly at the huge congregation who were there. Spent most of the ceremony on my knees chanting an unfamiliar sutra. It was really a test of will power and patience. I got lost a lot of times, my tired mind trying to cope with the unfamiliar fan2 ti3 zi 4 in the prayer book. But it was worth it.. the merits were transferred to the thousands who perished in the tsunami disaster ...
Had a quickie meal then rushed off for Buddhist Fellowship... didn't get lost.. ( smirk) see lz.. i can soooo find my way .. haha.
The guest speaker Sylvia Bay gave a speech on the Buddhist attitude to natural calamities. Here's sorta summary of the talk.
Upon hearing about the disaster, most ppl had only one question on their minds -- Why??? Most Buddhist dismissed the events as pure bad karma. or a collective karma of the world. But Sylvia disagreed. SHe pointed that there were two aspects to the Why?
One was - the natural disaster
The other was - the death count..
Why did the natural disaster occur?
WHY the enormous death count?
Natural disaster: this is easy to explain.. just open your geog textbook. The faults , the sliding of the plates, the displacement of the ocean due to the release of the tension that had been building up.
THe enormous death count was a hard one to comprehend. Sylvia emphasised that it was unfair to judge that it was a bad karmic consequence. Because Karma was far to complex to comprehend. It wasn't a simple affair of a boomerang effect. IT doesn't mean that doing A begets A. The death toll was a matter of conditionality. Only the Buddha has the ability to see into your mind and devulge the karmic cause of your conditions.
Man has a habit of going against nature.. it's a natural surival instinct. We colonise the planet. We cut down trees.. mangrove swamp, we build resorts.. She pointed out that of those people saved, most of them had climbed trees, which held out against the onslaught of the monster wave. On top of that, scientists did mentioned that mangrove swamps could have helped saved some beach fronts. If the beach was not used for commercial gain, the death toll would have been less catastrophic. So it was man's actions that placed led him to cross paths with the unfortunate geographical conditions. Not to say that occupying beaches is a bad thing.. it's just happened that it was a suay choice.
THere are 5 laws that the Buddha taught
The law of physics
the law of biology
the law of the mind
the law of the Dharma
the law of karma
These 5 laws operate simultaneously to give rise to occurances. They give rise to conditions ... but because man is his own master, his decisions will guide how he harnesses these conditions to obtain the fruit .
The pple of Phuket lost sooo much as compared to the people in Africa.. even tho' both countries had prior warning. It was because of a bad decision made by the meteorologist. who did get info that an earth quake may occur, but who thought that sounding an alert would mean disruption of the tourists trade ( esp since it was the peak of the tourist season).. on the other hand, the ppl in Africa suffered minimal loss of life ( as compared to the rest of the countries) because the gov. immediately commenced evacuation. So because greed took precedence over the lives of ppl.. this an action led to terrible consequences.
It's decisions made by our mind that lead to our fate. like that angmoh who ran back 6 times to save ppl.. and got washed away by the waves.. If he had stopped mebbe at the 5th time, he would have lived. But he chose to play the odds. Not to say wat he did was stupid..on the contrary it was extremely commandable.. the pureness of compassion in his heart at the mmt of death will definitely see him reborn into a life of goodness.. but the hard part lies in how his famly can deal with his departure from this life. It was his decision and we have to respect that and his courage.... There was no other questions how or why he died.. he weighed the odds with his mind, he assessed the conditions at that time, and he just did what he judged was best for him and the children he tried to save.
I suppose it's all about choices. It's all about letting go.Do the best you can, and let go.. the want to do stuff it's the one driving you nearer and nearer to dhukka. ( suffering) .. and further and further from nibanna.. yez.. it's true..
you want to help ease suffering
you want to do charity work
you want..
you want.
It's actually doing the act that releases you from this craving and your suffering.. but you've gotta know also when to let go..
My group had a discussion on wat we could do to help ourselves and the ppl there cope with the disaster. and we drew the conclusion that yez.. we can and must help, but we must stand back with a clear mind and assess our strengths and where they can be put to use. there was no point running into aceh w/o the necessary support.. and being a burden rather than a help. the Buddhist Fellowship members were going soon on a firefly mission to help in the disaster struck areas. may the Devas and the Bodhisattvas keep them safe.
Was a pretty tiring but fufilling day. Really enjoyed Buddhist fellowship. :) have to get used to chanting the suttas in pali tho'.
Action: snoozing on bed
supposed to go joggin today. After a long long delay ( raining the past few dayz everytime i step outt of the house).. but was sooo exhausted, i just landed on bed, shut my eyes and slept right till dinner time.. zzzonk.
shouldn't have slept so late last night.. dionk. was late again for service ( dionk dionk). so paiseh, walked in in the middle of the great compassionate repentence ceremony, stared blankly at the huge congregation who were there. Spent most of the ceremony on my knees chanting an unfamiliar sutra. It was really a test of will power and patience. I got lost a lot of times, my tired mind trying to cope with the unfamiliar fan2 ti3 zi 4 in the prayer book. But it was worth it.. the merits were transferred to the thousands who perished in the tsunami disaster ...
Had a quickie meal then rushed off for Buddhist Fellowship... didn't get lost.. ( smirk) see lz.. i can soooo find my way .. haha.
The guest speaker Sylvia Bay gave a speech on the Buddhist attitude to natural calamities. Here's sorta summary of the talk.
Upon hearing about the disaster, most ppl had only one question on their minds -- Why??? Most Buddhist dismissed the events as pure bad karma. or a collective karma of the world. But Sylvia disagreed. SHe pointed that there were two aspects to the Why?
One was - the natural disaster
The other was - the death count..
Why did the natural disaster occur?
WHY the enormous death count?
Natural disaster: this is easy to explain.. just open your geog textbook. The faults , the sliding of the plates, the displacement of the ocean due to the release of the tension that had been building up.
THe enormous death count was a hard one to comprehend. Sylvia emphasised that it was unfair to judge that it was a bad karmic consequence. Because Karma was far to complex to comprehend. It wasn't a simple affair of a boomerang effect. IT doesn't mean that doing A begets A. The death toll was a matter of conditionality. Only the Buddha has the ability to see into your mind and devulge the karmic cause of your conditions.
Man has a habit of going against nature.. it's a natural surival instinct. We colonise the planet. We cut down trees.. mangrove swamp, we build resorts.. She pointed out that of those people saved, most of them had climbed trees, which held out against the onslaught of the monster wave. On top of that, scientists did mentioned that mangrove swamps could have helped saved some beach fronts. If the beach was not used for commercial gain, the death toll would have been less catastrophic. So it was man's actions that placed led him to cross paths with the unfortunate geographical conditions. Not to say that occupying beaches is a bad thing.. it's just happened that it was a suay choice.
THere are 5 laws that the Buddha taught
The law of physics
the law of biology
the law of the mind
the law of the Dharma
the law of karma
These 5 laws operate simultaneously to give rise to occurances. They give rise to conditions ... but because man is his own master, his decisions will guide how he harnesses these conditions to obtain the fruit .
The pple of Phuket lost sooo much as compared to the people in Africa.. even tho' both countries had prior warning. It was because of a bad decision made by the meteorologist. who did get info that an earth quake may occur, but who thought that sounding an alert would mean disruption of the tourists trade ( esp since it was the peak of the tourist season).. on the other hand, the ppl in Africa suffered minimal loss of life ( as compared to the rest of the countries) because the gov. immediately commenced evacuation. So because greed took precedence over the lives of ppl.. this an action led to terrible consequences.
It's decisions made by our mind that lead to our fate. like that angmoh who ran back 6 times to save ppl.. and got washed away by the waves.. If he had stopped mebbe at the 5th time, he would have lived. But he chose to play the odds. Not to say wat he did was stupid..on the contrary it was extremely commandable.. the pureness of compassion in his heart at the mmt of death will definitely see him reborn into a life of goodness.. but the hard part lies in how his famly can deal with his departure from this life. It was his decision and we have to respect that and his courage.... There was no other questions how or why he died.. he weighed the odds with his mind, he assessed the conditions at that time, and he just did what he judged was best for him and the children he tried to save.
I suppose it's all about choices. It's all about letting go.Do the best you can, and let go.. the want to do stuff it's the one driving you nearer and nearer to dhukka. ( suffering) .. and further and further from nibanna.. yez.. it's true..
you want to help ease suffering
you want to do charity work
you want..
you want.
It's actually doing the act that releases you from this craving and your suffering.. but you've gotta know also when to let go..
My group had a discussion on wat we could do to help ourselves and the ppl there cope with the disaster. and we drew the conclusion that yez.. we can and must help, but we must stand back with a clear mind and assess our strengths and where they can be put to use. there was no point running into aceh w/o the necessary support.. and being a burden rather than a help. the Buddhist Fellowship members were going soon on a firefly mission to help in the disaster struck areas. may the Devas and the Bodhisattvas keep them safe.
Was a pretty tiring but fufilling day. Really enjoyed Buddhist fellowship. :) have to get used to chanting the suttas in pali tho'.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
Watched Budak with half of mumsg, HH, nK and jaz and the other XL ( the i stress.. not so authentic one.. *smirk*) . Well, it was held in the aud thiz time. Budak was as entertaining as ever, but they gave me the impression that they were tired. But nevertheless, it was another wonderful session to juz sit back and let acap music take hold. COuldn't really see them tho'. coz of my vertically challenged nature, coz this idiot in front of me was holding a video cam up which strategically blocked whoever I was trying to see... the acoustics were good... a tad crowded tho'. i like the open concept of cafe blue moo on teh roof top.
mew: JIA YOU!!!!! * grabs pompoms * You can do it gal! you can do it gal! DOn't give up. * grabs millipedes off the wall* your frens are also rooting for you! ... and to counter the claim that you said you held the record, i just heard that someone has a record twice as big as yours, so don't worry..
Still listening to Tanya Chua's version of Drops of Jupiter. I"m obsessed with that song. I"ve been listening to it on repeat on my mp3..
Now that she’s back in the atmosphere
With drops of jupiter in her hair, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there’s time to change, hey, hey
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like june, hey, hey
Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated
Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there
realised that my music standard as deteriotated steadily to the point where I can no longer listen and play by ear ( i doubt i ever had that ability actually, judging from my teache'rs rxn last time in yamaha) . Groan.. it's eating into me, not being able to script this song. Ahhhhhh... and i'm driving everyone nuts by playing it again and again. but i'm still stuck at the first chord..
Actually, all that piano training for nothing. I feel guitly sometimes looking at my cert on the wall. My parents paid so much for my music education and it kinda amounted to nothing. THey forked out so much for my pianos ( an upright and later a grand) which is now sitting pretty and mostly unused in my house. They paid for my music education at Yamaha, private piano lessons, blahblah.. i struggled in Yamaha actually. My mom pleaded with the teacher to lemme into the JSAC class ( junior special advance course) altho'i was never shortlisted int eh first place. After granting me a 2nd audition, the teacher yielded to my mom's request. I recall sitting like a blur sotong at my elect. keyboard and not really understanding wat was expected of me. Group classes were like some sort of ego crusher. Everyone seemed to be able to spontaneously compose, improvise, play by ear, perform... they played like true music prodigies.. ( which were wat they were ) . It frustrated me so much.. I had no idea why the music flowed so easily for them. There seemed to be an unsurmountable barrier for me in every task the teacher asked me to do. If he asked me to play back a tune by ear, I couldn't do it. The notes just wouldn't come. I was utterly at a lost. I just sat at the piano and banged out some really irrelevent nonsense. When he asked me to tranpose the piece, I coudln't do it. It wasn't natural, sure.. if he gave me more time to pract, mebbe i could have done it, but i sure coudln't do it impromtu. When they asked me to do variations and improvisations, I gave the most simple or the most ridiculolus variation ever ( which ever came into my mind first) . I remember my compositions sucked the worse. My fren's compositions were good enuff to be exhibited in public.. Mine never made it pass the first round. yeah, i think the furthest I got was having my comp recorded and sent to Japan .. some card came back to me thanking me for my participation.
My music teachers ranged from downright abusive to the utterly exasperated. One of them vented his frustrations on me. He pushed me off the piano bench, slammed my head onto the keyboard, pulled my hair hard, jabbed me on my temples, beat my hand.
I thot I was being teh awful student, so i kept silent, biting back my lips to prevent the tears from coming every lesson. I retied my dishevelled ponytails, picked myself up from teh floor after being jabbed down by him and tried again.. and again and again. nothing seemed to please this madman. I would rejoice silently when he left the room to go to teh toilet ( which he did really often). I would tremble when I heard his footsteps approach the door. It was until my mom discovered red markings and bruisings on my arms and confronted him that the whole ordeal drew to a halt. btw, that teacher had to go for anger management treatment. I remember the only lesson I had that went w/o physical abuse was when I told him it was my birthday. I think i was only primary 2 at that time.
I was placed under another teacher. He was an excellent teacher.. but unfortunatley, the same could not be said of his pupil. Well.. let's just say that instead of banging my head on teh keyboard , he banged his own head on teh keyboard.
After years of feeling extremely inferior to my peers, I decided to quit. that was in Sec3 i think. I had endured about 7 years of that nightmarish experience in JSAC and later SSAC. I was acutally a few months short of graduating.. but i really had to throw in the towel. Well, the whole expericen wasn't great, but there were fleeting mmts of enjoyment i suppose. I liike performing in a group.. One of my favs was being a percussionist playing and dancing to flint stones ( iwas not praised for being the best percussionist, but i did draw some good comments for my dancing.. hai.. unrelatedto my music ed tho'.)
Ironically, I decided to take up MEP in school ( hahahahah.. ) . so it started again, being stuck in a class full of music geniuses, looking extremely blur during theory lessons.. I was with a private music teacher that time.. she was relaly nice, but she dind't really encourage me to discoveahr new pieces of music other than my exam pieces. I gave up MEP after that.. well.i think out of teh class of 20, only 2 remained in teh end.. LOL. I finished a diploma shortly before MEP because I thought it would help me with my MEP. yeah. right. waste of $$
Yeah.. so if you ask me what grade i have in piano.. and I tell you i have a diploma... pls spare me the "wahhh.." and the "whoa" coz i tell you.. i'm not up to scratch at all. I've seen pple with grade 8 piano certs perform much better than me. I think at the present, the most i can tickle out on teh piano is some pop /jazz pieces..
So you might think that ends my turbulent love hate relationship with music??? nah.. more came. Choir singing, acapella... and the disasters tat followed. Now i finally settled on something I love.. guitar playing. It's self taught, i'm not getting very far.. but for once in my life, I 've found music in a form that i truly adore. Singing and playing my baobei. pure blisss..... :P free from the pressures of music exam, free from the pressures to perform, free from expectations of frens and family to be some music genius, free from the politics of singing in a group.. juz me and my guitar.. oh yeah!
" pull up your socks ! I've no idea how you actually got into this course in the first place" - my 1st jsac teacher.
" why can't you .." *poke* " play " * poke* " ... Properly?????" * poke poke crash* - JSAC teacher no. 2
poke+ pulling ponytail + beating = xtra bruises( not xtra motivation).. - lessons with jsac teacher no. 2
" blur sotong.. you know wat that is?" - jsac teacher no 3
mew: JIA YOU!!!!! * grabs pompoms * You can do it gal! you can do it gal! DOn't give up. * grabs millipedes off the wall* your frens are also rooting for you! ... and to counter the claim that you said you held the record, i just heard that someone has a record twice as big as yours, so don't worry..
Still listening to Tanya Chua's version of Drops of Jupiter. I"m obsessed with that song. I"ve been listening to it on repeat on my mp3..
Now that she’s back in the atmosphere
With drops of jupiter in her hair, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there’s time to change, hey, hey
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like june, hey, hey
Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated
Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there
realised that my music standard as deteriotated steadily to the point where I can no longer listen and play by ear ( i doubt i ever had that ability actually, judging from my teache'rs rxn last time in yamaha) . Groan.. it's eating into me, not being able to script this song. Ahhhhhh... and i'm driving everyone nuts by playing it again and again. but i'm still stuck at the first chord..
Actually, all that piano training for nothing. I feel guitly sometimes looking at my cert on the wall. My parents paid so much for my music education and it kinda amounted to nothing. THey forked out so much for my pianos ( an upright and later a grand) which is now sitting pretty and mostly unused in my house. They paid for my music education at Yamaha, private piano lessons, blahblah.. i struggled in Yamaha actually. My mom pleaded with the teacher to lemme into the JSAC class ( junior special advance course) altho'i was never shortlisted int eh first place. After granting me a 2nd audition, the teacher yielded to my mom's request. I recall sitting like a blur sotong at my elect. keyboard and not really understanding wat was expected of me. Group classes were like some sort of ego crusher. Everyone seemed to be able to spontaneously compose, improvise, play by ear, perform... they played like true music prodigies.. ( which were wat they were ) . It frustrated me so much.. I had no idea why the music flowed so easily for them. There seemed to be an unsurmountable barrier for me in every task the teacher asked me to do. If he asked me to play back a tune by ear, I couldn't do it. The notes just wouldn't come. I was utterly at a lost. I just sat at the piano and banged out some really irrelevent nonsense. When he asked me to tranpose the piece, I coudln't do it. It wasn't natural, sure.. if he gave me more time to pract, mebbe i could have done it, but i sure coudln't do it impromtu. When they asked me to do variations and improvisations, I gave the most simple or the most ridiculolus variation ever ( which ever came into my mind first) . I remember my compositions sucked the worse. My fren's compositions were good enuff to be exhibited in public.. Mine never made it pass the first round. yeah, i think the furthest I got was having my comp recorded and sent to Japan .. some card came back to me thanking me for my participation.
My music teachers ranged from downright abusive to the utterly exasperated. One of them vented his frustrations on me. He pushed me off the piano bench, slammed my head onto the keyboard, pulled my hair hard, jabbed me on my temples, beat my hand.
I thot I was being teh awful student, so i kept silent, biting back my lips to prevent the tears from coming every lesson. I retied my dishevelled ponytails, picked myself up from teh floor after being jabbed down by him and tried again.. and again and again. nothing seemed to please this madman. I would rejoice silently when he left the room to go to teh toilet ( which he did really often). I would tremble when I heard his footsteps approach the door. It was until my mom discovered red markings and bruisings on my arms and confronted him that the whole ordeal drew to a halt. btw, that teacher had to go for anger management treatment. I remember the only lesson I had that went w/o physical abuse was when I told him it was my birthday. I think i was only primary 2 at that time.
I was placed under another teacher. He was an excellent teacher.. but unfortunatley, the same could not be said of his pupil. Well.. let's just say that instead of banging my head on teh keyboard , he banged his own head on teh keyboard.
After years of feeling extremely inferior to my peers, I decided to quit. that was in Sec3 i think. I had endured about 7 years of that nightmarish experience in JSAC and later SSAC. I was acutally a few months short of graduating.. but i really had to throw in the towel. Well, the whole expericen wasn't great, but there were fleeting mmts of enjoyment i suppose. I liike performing in a group.. One of my favs was being a percussionist playing and dancing to flint stones ( iwas not praised for being the best percussionist, but i did draw some good comments for my dancing.. hai.. unrelatedto my music ed tho'.)
Ironically, I decided to take up MEP in school ( hahahahah.. ) . so it started again, being stuck in a class full of music geniuses, looking extremely blur during theory lessons.. I was with a private music teacher that time.. she was relaly nice, but she dind't really encourage me to discoveahr new pieces of music other than my exam pieces. I gave up MEP after that.. well.i think out of teh class of 20, only 2 remained in teh end.. LOL. I finished a diploma shortly before MEP because I thought it would help me with my MEP. yeah. right. waste of $$
Yeah.. so if you ask me what grade i have in piano.. and I tell you i have a diploma... pls spare me the "wahhh.." and the "whoa" coz i tell you.. i'm not up to scratch at all. I've seen pple with grade 8 piano certs perform much better than me. I think at the present, the most i can tickle out on teh piano is some pop /jazz pieces..
So you might think that ends my turbulent love hate relationship with music??? nah.. more came. Choir singing, acapella... and the disasters tat followed. Now i finally settled on something I love.. guitar playing. It's self taught, i'm not getting very far.. but for once in my life, I 've found music in a form that i truly adore. Singing and playing my baobei. pure blisss..... :P free from the pressures of music exam, free from the pressures to perform, free from expectations of frens and family to be some music genius, free from the politics of singing in a group.. juz me and my guitar.. oh yeah!
" pull up your socks ! I've no idea how you actually got into this course in the first place" - my 1st jsac teacher.
" why can't you .." *poke* " play " * poke* " ... Properly?????" * poke poke crash* - JSAC teacher no. 2
poke+ pulling ponytail + beating = xtra bruises( not xtra motivation).. - lessons with jsac teacher no. 2
" blur sotong.. you know wat that is?" - jsac teacher no 3
Friday, January 07, 2005
was archiving my blog in my computer.. amazing the amt of shit i can write in 2 years.. 100 over pages in MS word! whoa. Reread some entries.. some made me laugh, others made me cringe.
Weblogs.
i'ts the latest buzzword!Who would have known that public diaries would ever become so embraced by society? I think i started my own blog when I just entered uni. Most of my friends have blogs too as you can see from the "links" column.
Blogs contain an amazing variety of content. Some are just downright creative.. Lz's blog is a really funky example ( i think you should be up there vying for best blog gal!)
, some are controversial like xiaxue's blog, others are just downright ridiculous.. (steven lim's one) . My own blog contains a mixture of reflections on issues ( My sister calls it cheem crap, i dont' think it's cheem at all my dear) , and snippnets of my life. Although I have blogged a fair bit, i still keep most of my feelings private.. I do have a diary, and i'm sorry, unless the sun rises from the norht, it's never gonna see the light of day. It never fails to stun me how much some people would reveal onlin. They strip themselves right down, bloggni about all their emotional vulnerabilities. I admit that I am sometimes guilty of that very act, but i always ensure that I draw the line in how much "emotional masturbation" ( as lz would put it) i indulge in. I feel uncomfortable , reading about my fren's deepest darkest feelings. I guess they don't mind, coz they placed it up online and allowed links to their blogs, but yet the nagging uneasiness remains.
Some blogs piss me off. steven lim's one pisses me off to teh point that i'm laughing , coz it's just overinflated with his ego. Some are pretty insensitive.. BLogs are for public viewing and even tho' you'd like yours to be controversial and honest, it is only right that you exercise some responsibility in censorship. but then again, since the KKK still exists, and the skinheads run amok in Russia...
I suppose blogs are a great way to keep in touch with friends and update yourself about what's happening in their lives. But sometimes, I really wonder who reads my blog. Strangers? Old pals? Secret admirers ? *snort* My MOm?!
Martians ?!
budak is today.. yay yay yay!
Weblogs.
i'ts the latest buzzword!Who would have known that public diaries would ever become so embraced by society? I think i started my own blog when I just entered uni. Most of my friends have blogs too as you can see from the "links" column.
Blogs contain an amazing variety of content. Some are just downright creative.. Lz's blog is a really funky example ( i think you should be up there vying for best blog gal!)
, some are controversial like xiaxue's blog, others are just downright ridiculous.. (steven lim's one) . My own blog contains a mixture of reflections on issues ( My sister calls it cheem crap, i dont' think it's cheem at all my dear) , and snippnets of my life. Although I have blogged a fair bit, i still keep most of my feelings private.. I do have a diary, and i'm sorry, unless the sun rises from the norht, it's never gonna see the light of day. It never fails to stun me how much some people would reveal onlin. They strip themselves right down, bloggni about all their emotional vulnerabilities. I admit that I am sometimes guilty of that very act, but i always ensure that I draw the line in how much "emotional masturbation" ( as lz would put it) i indulge in. I feel uncomfortable , reading about my fren's deepest darkest feelings. I guess they don't mind, coz they placed it up online and allowed links to their blogs, but yet the nagging uneasiness remains.
Some blogs piss me off. steven lim's one pisses me off to teh point that i'm laughing , coz it's just overinflated with his ego. Some are pretty insensitive.. BLogs are for public viewing and even tho' you'd like yours to be controversial and honest, it is only right that you exercise some responsibility in censorship. but then again, since the KKK still exists, and the skinheads run amok in Russia...
I suppose blogs are a great way to keep in touch with friends and update yourself about what's happening in their lives. But sometimes, I really wonder who reads my blog. Strangers? Old pals? Secret admirers ? *snort* My MOm?!
Martians ?!
budak is today.. yay yay yay!
Thursday, January 06, 2005
what lies in the room beyond
just watched some mtv show where they let thiz dude loose in the rooms of 3 gals. He gets to sift thru their stuff to learn more abt them and then picks one of them for a date. Quite funny, well.. the guy was a bit of a jerk. But some of the stuff.. tsk tsk. BUt i came to teh conclusion, yeah, you could tell quite a lot about the person by looking at the rooms.
Lemme see if I let a room raider loose in my room .. what he'd find.
note: room in melb more accurate, since it's mantained by me and not shared with anyone
well.. most of my frens say my room is reasonably neat. I"m not a very neat person back in Spore( according to my mom), but i do put away stuff if i'm mantaining my own room.
winnie the pooh posters, inspirational posters - i like art. I love drawing, and i adore pix of beautiful landscapes and cute cartoons. i think the posters brighten up the room. i took 'em down once.. felt sooo empty. If only i can put up my starwars poster.. heh.
post card collection and photos ( on walls) - i think the postcards look funky ( gives the room a 1970s kinda feel) photos: i'm a sentimental idiot. i like to keep ppl who are dear to me, near to me.
quotes from sutras and a bookmark from my reverend - reminds me to keep the Dharma in my mind and in my heart.
bed - can't really stand it when my bed is a mess. make it first thing in teh morning. bed covers are a soothing green with flowers on them. I don't have a bolster... 2 pillows suffice :P
stuffed toys stuffed in a corner - i've very few stuffed toys coz i've a sensitive nose. These were given by close pals. :P I love the pink and green bear one of my best pals xy gave me that have my initials on them. The Buddhist bracelet around the pink bear reminds me again to keep Buddha's teachings in my heart and in my life.
closet: ok.. this is messy most of the time. I don't have shelves, so everything is folded and placed at the bottom. I do rearrange it once in a while, but most of the time, the clothes are threatening to topple over in their ungainly piles. I do fold my clothes tho'. Don't really iron so most of them are pretty rumpled.. hee. ( can see j9 shaking her head)
drawers: messy too. documents are just shoved in. Underwear drawer is an utter mess half the time. but it's an organised mess. I hope
desk. : messy messy messy. I will put my books back when i'm done tho'. but usually i sleep early ( and on top of my notes) crawl into bed and rise early to study .. and then rush off for my morning jog and then to uni. so my desk is pretty messy half the time. usually you'll find my lap top ( with dust thrown in ) .. lamp, phone, stationary drawers, books left open, worksheets, dirty cup of milo ...
book shelf - It's neat enuff i suppose. I don't arrange the books to height like my mom would do, but the books areplaced on the shelf. Photo frames and deco. items are on top with my radio . holds my collection of cds, Buddhist books, med books, papers..
radio and cds- I love acapella music. Budak pantai rulez! I also like the melb group Idea of North. Next to that, I usually listen to 100FM on radio with richard the love god. I love sentimental hits and RnB
my baobei- no. i don't keep a greek god in my room. baobei is the name of my darling guitar. Yamaha brand, dunno wat model.. a gift from my parents in J1. You'll hear me twanging it in the wee hours of the morning ( sorry j9) ... or late at night. I play it when i'm sick of muggin, when i'm stressed, when i need to relax., or when i've the urge to write stupid tunes. I like singing too.. bwahaha.. assualt to your ears.
floor- clean my room once a week. so it depends when you explore the room. it get progressively dustier nearer to the end of teh week. I keep books from the lib on the floor but in stacks. Bags are placed the floor
Chair - ahhh... my fav.. i love my leather chair.. so comfy... purrrrrr... usually it's draped in my nightclothes or my jeans for the week.. lol
shampoo bottles from hyatt - i love my collection. haha.. very nice bottles. lining the window seal with my XL teddies.
laundry basket - the pile juz gets higher..
Simple room i have there i suppose. it's pink carpet.. pretty cosy. I like. :) only thing is my sister ain't there .. hai.
verdict: ok. mebbe not so neat as you think i am.. haha. you didn't look beyond the closed doors. I've nothing racy ( sorry guys, no tongs, n my boobs aren't exactly c cup.) .. good little Buddhist girl.*innocent smile * I am a music lover. My radio and my baobei are my most precious things in the room. soso neat and clean person. ( can see mom rolling her eyes) can't really be bothered with image tho'. haha. that's my room.
just watched some mtv show where they let thiz dude loose in the rooms of 3 gals. He gets to sift thru their stuff to learn more abt them and then picks one of them for a date. Quite funny, well.. the guy was a bit of a jerk. But some of the stuff.. tsk tsk. BUt i came to teh conclusion, yeah, you could tell quite a lot about the person by looking at the rooms.
Lemme see if I let a room raider loose in my room .. what he'd find.
note: room in melb more accurate, since it's mantained by me and not shared with anyone
well.. most of my frens say my room is reasonably neat. I"m not a very neat person back in Spore( according to my mom), but i do put away stuff if i'm mantaining my own room.
winnie the pooh posters, inspirational posters - i like art. I love drawing, and i adore pix of beautiful landscapes and cute cartoons. i think the posters brighten up the room. i took 'em down once.. felt sooo empty. If only i can put up my starwars poster.. heh.
post card collection and photos ( on walls) - i think the postcards look funky ( gives the room a 1970s kinda feel) photos: i'm a sentimental idiot. i like to keep ppl who are dear to me, near to me.
quotes from sutras and a bookmark from my reverend - reminds me to keep the Dharma in my mind and in my heart.
bed - can't really stand it when my bed is a mess. make it first thing in teh morning. bed covers are a soothing green with flowers on them. I don't have a bolster... 2 pillows suffice :P
stuffed toys stuffed in a corner - i've very few stuffed toys coz i've a sensitive nose. These were given by close pals. :P I love the pink and green bear one of my best pals xy gave me that have my initials on them. The Buddhist bracelet around the pink bear reminds me again to keep Buddha's teachings in my heart and in my life.
closet: ok.. this is messy most of the time. I don't have shelves, so everything is folded and placed at the bottom. I do rearrange it once in a while, but most of the time, the clothes are threatening to topple over in their ungainly piles. I do fold my clothes tho'. Don't really iron so most of them are pretty rumpled.. hee. ( can see j9 shaking her head)
drawers: messy too. documents are just shoved in. Underwear drawer is an utter mess half the time. but it's an organised mess. I hope
desk. : messy messy messy. I will put my books back when i'm done tho'. but usually i sleep early ( and on top of my notes) crawl into bed and rise early to study .. and then rush off for my morning jog and then to uni. so my desk is pretty messy half the time. usually you'll find my lap top ( with dust thrown in ) .. lamp, phone, stationary drawers, books left open, worksheets, dirty cup of milo ...
book shelf - It's neat enuff i suppose. I don't arrange the books to height like my mom would do, but the books areplaced on the shelf. Photo frames and deco. items are on top with my radio . holds my collection of cds, Buddhist books, med books, papers..
radio and cds- I love acapella music. Budak pantai rulez! I also like the melb group Idea of North. Next to that, I usually listen to 100FM on radio with richard the love god. I love sentimental hits and RnB
my baobei- no. i don't keep a greek god in my room. baobei is the name of my darling guitar. Yamaha brand, dunno wat model.. a gift from my parents in J1. You'll hear me twanging it in the wee hours of the morning ( sorry j9) ... or late at night. I play it when i'm sick of muggin, when i'm stressed, when i need to relax., or when i've the urge to write stupid tunes. I like singing too.. bwahaha.. assualt to your ears.
floor- clean my room once a week. so it depends when you explore the room. it get progressively dustier nearer to the end of teh week. I keep books from the lib on the floor but in stacks. Bags are placed the floor
Chair - ahhh... my fav.. i love my leather chair.. so comfy... purrrrrr... usually it's draped in my nightclothes or my jeans for the week.. lol
shampoo bottles from hyatt - i love my collection. haha.. very nice bottles. lining the window seal with my XL teddies.
laundry basket - the pile juz gets higher..
Simple room i have there i suppose. it's pink carpet.. pretty cosy. I like. :) only thing is my sister ain't there .. hai.
verdict: ok. mebbe not so neat as you think i am.. haha. you didn't look beyond the closed doors. I've nothing racy ( sorry guys, no tongs, n my boobs aren't exactly c cup.) .. good little Buddhist girl.*innocent smile * I am a music lover. My radio and my baobei are my most precious things in the room. soso neat and clean person. ( can see mom rolling her eyes) can't really be bothered with image tho'. haha. that's my room.
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
you've gotta go try the food at chinatown.. YUM. met up with nic, aiai and char last night. as usual. late again. shheeeesh. and got lost . got lost once at the outram interchange ( lousy sign s) got lost at chinatown. finally located nic at the corner of new bridge road and smith street. I admit .. i've the worst mapreading skills in the world. ( sheepish grinz) ... i can't seem to visualise how to walk! i've to turn the map around.. of course, i can't yank out a publically displayed map on a sign board so . yup. i got lost. grinz.
it's some huge hawker center on smith street. the claypot rice at 02128 is suppose to be good. but the uncle told me had to wait 50 min. so xian. so we ended up ordering some hongkong fish head ( i think). In the end, still waited 50 min.. but it was yummos!
hai.. can't wait for the weekend. can't wait to watch budak, can't wait to go for Buddhist fellowship.
ok. gonna meet HH and el now at city hall gonna be late again. urgh.Fashionably late
"it's the fashion to be late mah... fashionably late" - lz
it's some huge hawker center on smith street. the claypot rice at 02128 is suppose to be good. but the uncle told me had to wait 50 min. so xian. so we ended up ordering some hongkong fish head ( i think). In the end, still waited 50 min.. but it was yummos!
hai.. can't wait for the weekend. can't wait to watch budak, can't wait to go for Buddhist fellowship.
ok. gonna meet HH and el now at city hall gonna be late again. urgh.Fashionably late
"it's the fashion to be late mah... fashionably late" - lz
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
seen in an ST news article
Smart girls get left on the shelf.
I recall watching a doc about relationships and they were interviewing a bunch of female Harvard undergrads. These girls were describing how some guys tried to befriend them, but upon hearing that they were from Harvard, did an about turn and literally fled.
Even my faculties' GUbE ( our student mag) commented that while it was desirable to announce your status as a med student if you were a guy looknig for a girl, the same could not be said for a female med student.
Funny why there is always this huge discrimination against gals. I wonder how it started in the first place. Was it coz our physical built is not suitable for strength demanding jobs. judging from how man has lived in the past. ( let's look at the apemen and their tribes) the men did the hunting, the gals picked plants and fetched the water and reared the kids. Ok, fine, we coudln't bring home the bacon, but if we didn't look after the kids, would males actually have time to go looking for the bacon? and anyway, i think if we didn't bring back the melons and the veggies, humans would have died of serious nutrition deficiency..
*oink*
Even in religions, girls have also been condemned to be the more undesirable sex. Eve was seduced by the snake to consume the apple that banished mankind from the garden of eden. Buddha was reluctant to allow females into the sangha because it would mean that the Dharma would be forgotten by sentient beings sooner. Some islamic extremist groups like teh Taliban have ordered females to cover all visable parts of their anatomy because they were sexually appealing to men. Most of the highest posts in religions have long being held by males. even today, although females have become more accepted in monasteries and orders, the higher posts seem to be occupied mainly by males.
Leadership positions always seem to be comfortably occupied by our male counterparts. We females are still expected to conform to our role of raising the family and staying at home. We aren't any less inferior than our male counterparts in terms of our IQ and in physique. (true, we may lose out in sports and rigorous activity, but we outlive males) Why then have we always been repressed? Why can't we overcome that unspoken barrier placed in front of us.
Even though we have gained voting and working rights, leadership positions remain mostly out of reach because we are tied down by our duties to our hubbies and our kids. No one would blink an eye if the guys stole out every weekend for a boy's night out, leaving the kids and the wife at home. But a mother who did the same would be labled irresponsible by her inlaws. We're expected to perform well in school, carve out a great career, juggle motherhood and looking after our husbands. With that many balls to juggle, we have to make choices. You could be a jack of all trades, but you'll be master to none. Very few ladies can cope with both job and housewifemanship. Yeah, of coz they were probably the lucky ones with supportive husbands and well-behaved, responsible kids. But tell me, how many ppl are that lucky to have the perfect family? Strong headed as I am, i know that faced with a choice between career and havnig to stay at home to do a proper job of raising kids, i'm more inclined to choose the latter. So basically, since my dad busted a fortune to educate my brain, i 'd better not get married. :P
Mebbe it's Asian mentality. I spoke to HH after meeting a Chinese doctor and his wife. I commented that the doctor seemed like a really nice guy. HH agreed but she added that he was the typical china man. He expected his wife to be totally subservient to him. Not that we were criticising him, it was simply a social expectation. A man who was henpecked by his wife was help in utter disregard by his peers. The wife had to be subservient simply for the good of the whole family.
Guys preferred their wives to be less intelligent than them. The reasons probably varied.. mebbe it milked their ego, mebbe it was coz they had a hard enuff time at work and preferred a less intelligent wife to take care of them at home. mebbe coz it placed them at a advantage. i've no idea.
On the other hand, many women also prefer their hubbies to earn more tahn they did . So like my fren j9 and I muse.. you see many male docs getting together with female nurse.. but how many female docs do you see going out with male nurses?
it's a unspoken soial norm to "marry up". Singaporean men have started to look for foriegn brides, simply because their credentials were not good enuff for their better educated singaporean female counterparts. Even . My parents constantly urge me to look for my significant otehr in my faculty. my fren's parents urge them to look for someone "better" than their current squeeze. Although I don't really bother whether my partner is a doc /holds a phD etc.,I must admit that I still do consider education as a huge pointer if i am looking for a guy. I guess wat i'm looknig for is more intellectual compatability than actual credentials. I think the notion of "marrying up" is actually working to our advantage. We females are more emotioanlly vulnerable ( mebbe due to hormones) and yez.. i admit, we are physically weaker. We're in a more precarious position in a relationship. Our income ( determined by our education) can be exploited by husbands who are unscrupuluos , unemployed and desporate. I recall a case where a man bullied and extorted money from his better educated wife. The poor lady put up with all that because she didn't wanna disrupt the lives of their children. Yeah, don't say we're the weaker sex. We just put up with that crap for the sake of the children.
So smart girls get left on the shelf.
Social pressure? Self expectations? male chauvinism?
. Many of my girlfriends fall under this so -called "smart" catergory.. Yeah, they're good catches. They're wonderful caring ppl, mebbe not drop dead beauties.. but their inner beauty is truly dazzling.but... they're still on the shelf. My mom sometimes shakes her head and laments.. " the guys are blind...how come they're still single?"
*shrug* i'm trying to figure taht point out myself.
On a personal note, while like i mentioned above, I don't give a shit about wat kinda degree the guy has. It would be nice if he had a degree anyway. But then again, i don't really have the time took for guys, degrees or not. Because while my parents urge me to for a partner, they firmly told me to place my education first, something they've been telling me to do all my life. I went thru sec school as a practical nun, never exchanging a greeting a male counterpart, even when i had the chance to. My parents warned me against the dangers of mixing bgrs with school results and I heeded their warnings zealously. I recall being real icy to the guy gymnasts who trained the same time with uz. I remember my other team members made firm frens with some of the dudes that we trained with. I on the other hand, condemned it wrongfully as shameless flirting and an utter waste of precious training time. I refused to socialise with anything my age tat owned a dick and an adam's apple. I looked through them in tution classes, i ignored ex classmates. I certainly kept my part of my pact with my parents. I did well enuff at school, I was captain , I won medals, ... but i became some sort of a social ignoramus and that definitely limited my choice of partners at that point of time, a handicap that still haunts me to this day. Thing is, i've no time to deal with it.. i'm too busy still trying to perform in uni. too busy trying my darnest to be 'smart" because that's expected of me by society.. because that's wat i expect of myself.
The article said "perhaps females with high iq find males less interesting" .
nah, i don't think we find males less interesintg.. i think it's a multitude of factors tat cozes the prob. There's teh acceptance factor, the social norms,the male ego, the religious constrains , the rising expectations of uz to be super women ( all rounders in everything) and the stigma of being a female .
Smart girls get left on the shelf.
I recall watching a doc about relationships and they were interviewing a bunch of female Harvard undergrads. These girls were describing how some guys tried to befriend them, but upon hearing that they were from Harvard, did an about turn and literally fled.
Even my faculties' GUbE ( our student mag) commented that while it was desirable to announce your status as a med student if you were a guy looknig for a girl, the same could not be said for a female med student.
Funny why there is always this huge discrimination against gals. I wonder how it started in the first place. Was it coz our physical built is not suitable for strength demanding jobs. judging from how man has lived in the past. ( let's look at the apemen and their tribes) the men did the hunting, the gals picked plants and fetched the water and reared the kids. Ok, fine, we coudln't bring home the bacon, but if we didn't look after the kids, would males actually have time to go looking for the bacon? and anyway, i think if we didn't bring back the melons and the veggies, humans would have died of serious nutrition deficiency..
*oink*
Even in religions, girls have also been condemned to be the more undesirable sex. Eve was seduced by the snake to consume the apple that banished mankind from the garden of eden. Buddha was reluctant to allow females into the sangha because it would mean that the Dharma would be forgotten by sentient beings sooner. Some islamic extremist groups like teh Taliban have ordered females to cover all visable parts of their anatomy because they were sexually appealing to men. Most of the highest posts in religions have long being held by males. even today, although females have become more accepted in monasteries and orders, the higher posts seem to be occupied mainly by males.
Leadership positions always seem to be comfortably occupied by our male counterparts. We females are still expected to conform to our role of raising the family and staying at home. We aren't any less inferior than our male counterparts in terms of our IQ and in physique. (true, we may lose out in sports and rigorous activity, but we outlive males) Why then have we always been repressed? Why can't we overcome that unspoken barrier placed in front of us.
Even though we have gained voting and working rights, leadership positions remain mostly out of reach because we are tied down by our duties to our hubbies and our kids. No one would blink an eye if the guys stole out every weekend for a boy's night out, leaving the kids and the wife at home. But a mother who did the same would be labled irresponsible by her inlaws. We're expected to perform well in school, carve out a great career, juggle motherhood and looking after our husbands. With that many balls to juggle, we have to make choices. You could be a jack of all trades, but you'll be master to none. Very few ladies can cope with both job and housewifemanship. Yeah, of coz they were probably the lucky ones with supportive husbands and well-behaved, responsible kids. But tell me, how many ppl are that lucky to have the perfect family? Strong headed as I am, i know that faced with a choice between career and havnig to stay at home to do a proper job of raising kids, i'm more inclined to choose the latter. So basically, since my dad busted a fortune to educate my brain, i 'd better not get married. :P
Mebbe it's Asian mentality. I spoke to HH after meeting a Chinese doctor and his wife. I commented that the doctor seemed like a really nice guy. HH agreed but she added that he was the typical china man. He expected his wife to be totally subservient to him. Not that we were criticising him, it was simply a social expectation. A man who was henpecked by his wife was help in utter disregard by his peers. The wife had to be subservient simply for the good of the whole family.
Guys preferred their wives to be less intelligent than them. The reasons probably varied.. mebbe it milked their ego, mebbe it was coz they had a hard enuff time at work and preferred a less intelligent wife to take care of them at home. mebbe coz it placed them at a advantage. i've no idea.
On the other hand, many women also prefer their hubbies to earn more tahn they did . So like my fren j9 and I muse.. you see many male docs getting together with female nurse.. but how many female docs do you see going out with male nurses?
it's a unspoken soial norm to "marry up". Singaporean men have started to look for foriegn brides, simply because their credentials were not good enuff for their better educated singaporean female counterparts. Even . My parents constantly urge me to look for my significant otehr in my faculty. my fren's parents urge them to look for someone "better" than their current squeeze. Although I don't really bother whether my partner is a doc /holds a phD etc.,I must admit that I still do consider education as a huge pointer if i am looking for a guy. I guess wat i'm looknig for is more intellectual compatability than actual credentials. I think the notion of "marrying up" is actually working to our advantage. We females are more emotioanlly vulnerable ( mebbe due to hormones) and yez.. i admit, we are physically weaker. We're in a more precarious position in a relationship. Our income ( determined by our education) can be exploited by husbands who are unscrupuluos , unemployed and desporate. I recall a case where a man bullied and extorted money from his better educated wife. The poor lady put up with all that because she didn't wanna disrupt the lives of their children. Yeah, don't say we're the weaker sex. We just put up with that crap for the sake of the children.
So smart girls get left on the shelf.
Social pressure? Self expectations? male chauvinism?
. Many of my girlfriends fall under this so -called "smart" catergory.. Yeah, they're good catches. They're wonderful caring ppl, mebbe not drop dead beauties.. but their inner beauty is truly dazzling.but... they're still on the shelf. My mom sometimes shakes her head and laments.. " the guys are blind...how come they're still single?"
*shrug* i'm trying to figure taht point out myself.
On a personal note, while like i mentioned above, I don't give a shit about wat kinda degree the guy has. It would be nice if he had a degree anyway. But then again, i don't really have the time took for guys, degrees or not. Because while my parents urge me to for a partner, they firmly told me to place my education first, something they've been telling me to do all my life. I went thru sec school as a practical nun, never exchanging a greeting a male counterpart, even when i had the chance to. My parents warned me against the dangers of mixing bgrs with school results and I heeded their warnings zealously. I recall being real icy to the guy gymnasts who trained the same time with uz. I remember my other team members made firm frens with some of the dudes that we trained with. I on the other hand, condemned it wrongfully as shameless flirting and an utter waste of precious training time. I refused to socialise with anything my age tat owned a dick and an adam's apple. I looked through them in tution classes, i ignored ex classmates. I certainly kept my part of my pact with my parents. I did well enuff at school, I was captain , I won medals, ... but i became some sort of a social ignoramus and that definitely limited my choice of partners at that point of time, a handicap that still haunts me to this day. Thing is, i've no time to deal with it.. i'm too busy still trying to perform in uni. too busy trying my darnest to be 'smart" because that's expected of me by society.. because that's wat i expect of myself.
The article said "perhaps females with high iq find males less interesting" .
nah, i don't think we find males less interesintg.. i think it's a multitude of factors tat cozes the prob. There's teh acceptance factor, the social norms,the male ego, the religious constrains , the rising expectations of uz to be super women ( all rounders in everything) and the stigma of being a female .
no idea why my blog entries seem to be cut off all the time.
Update on the life of miss tan.
Bumming:
Ok, not really. i'm sleepy. *yawn*. yanti's coming back today, no more cooking wheeeeeeeeeeeee.. and i get to eat her yummy food! yay! have to stay home today coz got wait for her to arrive.
budak as confirmed tix with moi. in case you didn't get my email. pls check your mailbox coz it has the details in it
Reading...
some books i got from Buddhist Fellowship. There was a really interesting orange book.. " Wat not to look for in a religion"
i know i should get my ass to reading for my AMS, but can't be bothered lalala. gonna go back to reading " The Heart of Buddha's teachings later." cheeemalogy tho'. i'm still stuck chewing on wat was written on the first page. Theravada Buddhism is like a whole new discover for me.. wonder how saying suttas in pali is gonna be like. :)
watching shows.
I wanna watch ocean's 12. but hmm, teh reviews look bad. Enjoyedocean's 11. wonder why i fell asleep the first time i saw it.hee.. i think coz everyone else dozed off.. well, it was a movie marathon.
stupid job agency cancelled my interview.. hai. irritating. went to the gym with mommy instead. haven't been for ages, huffing and puffing during my usual run argh. i'm out of shape and flabby. eekz.
music"
i'm crazed for andrew llyodd webber's music every since watching Phantom. I keep singing " first man you remember" and " love changes everything " i think my sis wanna strangle me liao. dragged out my ole LD, and CDs with webber's songs.. haha. this is wat happens when i'm obsessed with something.. witness me go into high gear when starwars comes to town.
meeting some of mumsg for dinner at chinatown later. lz keeps raving about the food there :P haha..goodbye diet!
Update on the life of miss tan.
Bumming:
Ok, not really. i'm sleepy. *yawn*. yanti's coming back today, no more cooking wheeeeeeeeeeeee.. and i get to eat her yummy food! yay! have to stay home today coz got wait for her to arrive.
budak as confirmed tix with moi. in case you didn't get my email. pls check your mailbox coz it has the details in it
Reading...
some books i got from Buddhist Fellowship. There was a really interesting orange book.. " Wat not to look for in a religion"
i know i should get my ass to reading for my AMS, but can't be bothered lalala. gonna go back to reading " The Heart of Buddha's teachings later." cheeemalogy tho'. i'm still stuck chewing on wat was written on the first page. Theravada Buddhism is like a whole new discover for me.. wonder how saying suttas in pali is gonna be like. :)
watching shows.
I wanna watch ocean's 12. but hmm, teh reviews look bad. Enjoyedocean's 11. wonder why i fell asleep the first time i saw it.hee.. i think coz everyone else dozed off.. well, it was a movie marathon.
stupid job agency cancelled my interview.. hai. irritating. went to the gym with mommy instead. haven't been for ages, huffing and puffing during my usual run argh. i'm out of shape and flabby. eekz.
music"
i'm crazed for andrew llyodd webber's music every since watching Phantom. I keep singing " first man you remember" and " love changes everything " i think my sis wanna strangle me liao. dragged out my ole LD, and CDs with webber's songs.. haha. this is wat happens when i'm obsessed with something.. witness me go into high gear when starwars comes to town.
meeting some of mumsg for dinner at chinatown later. lz keeps raving about the food there :P haha..goodbye diet!
Sunday, January 02, 2005
went to SPH in the morning with Lz to help pack. Well, i think we were more redundant than anything.. SPH had like forklifts, good organisation, ns men and scouts there. so basically we had nothing much to do except pack the occasional donation arrival.
Then lz went for some relief talk at geylang. Followed her there. Turns out it was the place where the Buddhist Fellowship was based!!! Talk about conditions manz.. met thiz 2 very nice aunties who brought me for the fellowship meeting. It was awesome! There was thiz dude giving a dharma talk. THe nice nice thing was everything was in ENglish. haha.. ok. i mean tho' i find dharma talk sin chinese very enlightening and uplifting, i still struggle with listening to it been delivered in chinese. I juz missed their camp by a week.. GROAN. COuldn't join them for kungfu hustle after the meeting coz they had prior booking and anyway i already watched liao. a bit of a blur trying to remember new faces and new names.. will get there i hope. Met Ang Gan ( i think that was his name), who was vice chair of the BLIA Young adults div ( spore) i didn't know we had a YAD here too! hmm... only thing now is i've to plan my time on sundays well. if only i can teleport myself from fo guang shan to fellowship. gotta try to work that one out.
they're having a talk on karma and natural disaster next week... the very question I asked Buddha 3 days ago. Hopefully i'll find the answers there.
Then lz went for some relief talk at geylang. Followed her there. Turns out it was the place where the Buddhist Fellowship was based!!! Talk about conditions manz.. met thiz 2 very nice aunties who brought me for the fellowship meeting. It was awesome! There was thiz dude giving a dharma talk. THe nice nice thing was everything was in ENglish. haha.. ok. i mean tho' i find dharma talk sin chinese very enlightening and uplifting, i still struggle with listening to it been delivered in chinese. I juz missed their camp by a week.. GROAN. COuldn't join them for kungfu hustle after the meeting coz they had prior booking and anyway i already watched liao. a bit of a blur trying to remember new faces and new names.. will get there i hope. Met Ang Gan ( i think that was his name), who was vice chair of the BLIA Young adults div ( spore) i didn't know we had a YAD here too! hmm... only thing now is i've to plan my time on sundays well. if only i can teleport myself from fo guang shan to fellowship. gotta try to work that one out.
they're having a talk on karma and natural disaster next week... the very question I asked Buddha 3 days ago. Hopefully i'll find the answers there.
Saturday, January 01, 2005
new year's day.
Spent the day at the Soka Assc headquarters sorting out clothes for the tsunami victims. Saw some really ridiculous things some pple gavelike used undies. I mean c'mon. Who the hell wants to reuse your used underwear? And there were some clothes that were ripped/ soiled/stained really badly. Hey, it ain't a dumping ground ok? Winter wear? rattles?? (!)
On the other hand, there were really awesome ppl who donated new clothes! med supplies, food.. blankies. the list goes on. I suppose some pple were well meaning.. but after today, i can see why the org. keep appealing for cash donations. Coz lotsa the clothes simply weren't appropriate for a Muslim country. A lot of clothes that were still usable were rejected coz camisoles and hot shorts had no place in the places where they were to be sent.
Cash, medical supplies were probably the most appropiate. Boo to those ppl who used the place as a dumping ground for the most unimaginably unusable clothes. pls think twice before donating that free hand bag you got from metro or that pair of SIA socks you've worn a couple of times. Is it useful to the victims?
note that i'm not mad at these pple who gave the used undies. just a little disappointed that there is a degree of inconsideration among uz still.
The ppl helping out ranged from preteens to middle aged. but regardless of their age, they all worked tirelessly to receive, sort, package and seal the endless stream of clothes. The Uncle who was helping me seal and label the boxes placed his hand on his aching back and groaned. Poor guy had spent the large part of the afternoon bent double. we worked under the instruction of an energetic but slighly eccentric Indian auntie who had an impressive no. of charity project experiences under her belt.
"Tired? I can tell when u fall silent" The angmoh opposite me noted as we sorted through the pile of donated clothes.l
" goodness.. look at this shit.." he pointed at bag of used and stained undies next to me and grimaced. yez..OK FINE now.. i guess i do have smth against pple donating used underwear.
It was a bit of a logistics nightmare. Soon bags were overflowing out of the tent. Engrossed in sorting out clothes, i didn't realise the extent of the prob until one poor dude tripped and sent a bag sailing through the air.
I surrendered at 6pm, bade 2 of my sorting buddies farewell and slunked off to my dad's car. clothes probably weren't the best thing to render to the victims now.. but i felt a bit better than i 'd tried to do smth to help.
Spent the day at the Soka Assc headquarters sorting out clothes for the tsunami victims. Saw some really ridiculous things some pple gavelike used undies. I mean c'mon. Who the hell wants to reuse your used underwear? And there were some clothes that were ripped/ soiled/stained really badly. Hey, it ain't a dumping ground ok? Winter wear? rattles?? (!)
On the other hand, there were really awesome ppl who donated new clothes! med supplies, food.. blankies. the list goes on. I suppose some pple were well meaning.. but after today, i can see why the org. keep appealing for cash donations. Coz lotsa the clothes simply weren't appropriate for a Muslim country. A lot of clothes that were still usable were rejected coz camisoles and hot shorts had no place in the places where they were to be sent.
Cash, medical supplies were probably the most appropiate. Boo to those ppl who used the place as a dumping ground for the most unimaginably unusable clothes. pls think twice before donating that free hand bag you got from metro or that pair of SIA socks you've worn a couple of times. Is it useful to the victims?
note that i'm not mad at these pple who gave the used undies. just a little disappointed that there is a degree of inconsideration among uz still.
The ppl helping out ranged from preteens to middle aged. but regardless of their age, they all worked tirelessly to receive, sort, package and seal the endless stream of clothes. The Uncle who was helping me seal and label the boxes placed his hand on his aching back and groaned. Poor guy had spent the large part of the afternoon bent double. we worked under the instruction of an energetic but slighly eccentric Indian auntie who had an impressive no. of charity project experiences under her belt.
"Tired? I can tell when u fall silent" The angmoh opposite me noted as we sorted through the pile of donated clothes.l
" goodness.. look at this shit.." he pointed at bag of used and stained undies next to me and grimaced. yez..OK FINE now.. i guess i do have smth against pple donating used underwear.
It was a bit of a logistics nightmare. Soon bags were overflowing out of the tent. Engrossed in sorting out clothes, i didn't realise the extent of the prob until one poor dude tripped and sent a bag sailing through the air.
I surrendered at 6pm, bade 2 of my sorting buddies farewell and slunked off to my dad's car. clothes probably weren't the best thing to render to the victims now.. but i felt a bit better than i 'd tried to do smth to help.
as we usher in the new year...
It was a quiet end and a subdued beginning. For the first time, the New year party was held at Auntie C's house. And for the first time, the SIA kids were there. But there was no rowdy shouting , no countdown, no cheers to greet the New year. Only polite handshakes, ship horns, and my very unsuccessful attempt to uncork champagne ( with everyone staring at me in anticipation) .
No one brought cards, so we just sat around talking. The group was visibly smaller than the Xmas gathering. I brought my guitar. Strummed, sang a few songs. The 2 Chris and Cherie managed to learn "Hero" :) well done dudes and dudettes. Esp the guys ... playing the guitar juz completes the pictures Grinz...
reflections
It seems like I'm living on a different planet. Looking at the pix in the papers, with the bodies of ppl bloated and discoloured beyond recognition, i feel so disconnected from them, even tho' they lie a few hundred miles from our shores.It's like boxing day never happened. . I visited the temple to pray 2 days ago. I knelt in His compassionate light and asked why this could have happened. But the answer was already there in His teachings. Cause and Effect. The 1st and 2nd Noble truths. I asked for Buddha to guide the people who survived, and to ease their suffering and to help the relatives of the deceased to come to grips with the calamity. I pray that the deceased would be reborn in safer places.
http://habitatnews.nus.edu.sg/news/tsunamirelief/
check out the above site to find out how you can help.
It was a quiet end and a subdued beginning. For the first time, the New year party was held at Auntie C's house. And for the first time, the SIA kids were there. But there was no rowdy shouting , no countdown, no cheers to greet the New year. Only polite handshakes, ship horns, and my very unsuccessful attempt to uncork champagne ( with everyone staring at me in anticipation) .
No one brought cards, so we just sat around talking. The group was visibly smaller than the Xmas gathering. I brought my guitar. Strummed, sang a few songs. The 2 Chris and Cherie managed to learn "Hero" :) well done dudes and dudettes. Esp the guys ... playing the guitar juz completes the pictures Grinz...
reflections
It seems like I'm living on a different planet. Looking at the pix in the papers, with the bodies of ppl bloated and discoloured beyond recognition, i feel so disconnected from them, even tho' they lie a few hundred miles from our shores.It's like boxing day never happened. . I visited the temple to pray 2 days ago. I knelt in His compassionate light and asked why this could have happened. But the answer was already there in His teachings. Cause and Effect. The 1st and 2nd Noble truths. I asked for Buddha to guide the people who survived, and to ease their suffering and to help the relatives of the deceased to come to grips with the calamity. I pray that the deceased would be reborn in safer places.
http://habitatnews.nus.edu.sg/news/tsunamirelief/
check out the above site to find out how you can help.
