a little Xtra

After reading zhen's website.. :P thot i'll bring the subject of love and the brain a little further


LOve is a Many splendid things... or is it just a hell lot of neurotransmitters?

I 've had this debate before with CG . Is love really just a bunch of neurotransmitters and neurons firing? I think so. CG thot it was pure blasphemy to reduce love to a bunch of chemicals but I beg to differ.

Love is a sacred thing to humans. We sing songs about it, write tales about it, dream about it. Our whole life seems to revolve around it. Love for our family, love for our spouses, our partners and our friends. But then again, aren't all our feelings just manifestations of our brain at work? Our little amygdalas, hippocampi, limbic systems are responsible for this feelings ofwe get when when we are with someone whom we love.

What is love anyway? It's this warm fuzzy feeling we get, or maybe that tingling of excitement when you're aroudn that special someone. A feeling eh? So it can be grouped under a heading with other emotions such as anger, happiness, blah blah.. which again, leads back to the brain and it whole mirad of neurons and neurotransmitters. We're coined this word :love" simply to describe a form of interaction between fellow homo sapiens . However, social interactions are performed by the orbitofrontal cortex, and emotions by the limbic system. It's jus pure, energetic firing of neurons.

Don't get me wrong, i'm not taking away the importance of this emotion. we definietly need it to function. What would life be without love? It is after all a hallmark that we are human. I'ts proof that we have higher cognition and functioning. we have one BIG , F A T , cerebral cortex. And besides, we need love so that we can get ahead with life. Consider it a form of bridging capital perhaps. We need it so we can meet a suitable mate, procreate, bring up teh kids in the right environment, and to make sure they don't screw up their lives .

It's enjoyable, there's no doubt about. I think why we make it appear so sacred its because we're in awe of the surges of feelings ( or neurotransmitters) it brings to us. But then again, if our bodies are made up of atoms and molecules, wat's to stop us from scrutinising and reducing it to bits of molecules and atoms. Or even worst, we could just say love is some psychological process that can be explained by a neuro-psych model ( David andrewes might be able to draw one up.. heh)

I'm not anti-love, or bitter. I love my family, I love my friends, I love my guitar. I love that feeling of love when i'm around all of the above. But when I scrutinise love and lay it out on the dissecting table, i realise that's why it is about. Just atoms and molecules.
That's love for me. So shoot me if i'm taking this emotion off its sacred pedestral, but with the scans of brains lighting up in specific places ( more particularly, that of sex and visual stimuli in the male species), i'm more and more convinced that love is just a manifestation of a neuro psych/ molecular level. At least it's more solid that way.

I shouldn't be bloggin now. i suppose, i'm screwed. j9 just showed me a msg on topclass. apparently i should have included two more topics of discussion in my essay. and i can't be bothered to add it in . i'm over my word limit anyway. ah.. screw it. ahh.. i'm screwed.

test is on monday. wat the (*#&$(*@ am i doing here?

usual. tryin to multitask. trying to do essay, my pbl homework for nance, trying to blog , trying to do qns on topclass. LOL. i've not even got down to rev. proper. wowz. and yez, i think i'm having a toothache.


sounds like your run of a mill weekend eh?


Week?

Interesting lectures, bad lecutres. mixture of both.

had this doctor speak to uz about disabled kids and their families. really touching. SHe was a mother of a disabled boy herself. And i think wat she said really struck a chord in my heart.
HOw can we judge a 40 year old intellecutally disabled man to have the intellignece of a 2 year old? How can we discount his 40 years of life experience? Wat is intelligence anyway?
How can we say that disabled ppl can't contribute to society? THey 've help us to see the diversity and teh difference, they teach us tolerance, they make us stronger ppl and they touched teh lives of their frens and families. she was very much against putting these kids in speical schools. She pointed out.. teh whole point of schools was to teach the kids how to intergrate into society.. placing them in special schools defeats teh whole purpose. even watching a video of a severely austistic girl, I realised that she actually could communicate with her parents. The video also mentioned a 'respite." a day that teh parents could have a break when teh kids were watched over by a volunteer organisation. It hit me suddenly how much volunteering last year for the bbq meant to the parents. thanks lz for the chance to help out.


ALso had a lecutre on teh brain.. interesting fact. : when gals are shown pix of ppl they love, the areas of teh brain for affection light up on teh PET scan. when guys are shown teh pix, the areas ofr Sex and visual stimulus light up. SO THAT CONFIRMS IT. lizhen and i were laughing away in the lecture. Guys have nothing but sex on their minds. They have larger nuclei for sex anyway in their brains. Geez.. so all that mag and tabloid stuff was true. When I told nic K that he retorted.. " That's not true..." ( silence on the phone) .. " well,sometimes i guess." AH HA!
Ended up suaning him for being an mCP and looking like a monkey ( i'm quoting jas on this one...) got into a debate with nic about it too.. geez. there 's something about me, nics and debates. anyway, relax aiai.. it looks scary , but we're not about to wring each others throats.yet. anyway. Can't recall if lecturer mentioned anything about areas of the brains for wringing necks.
but anyhow bottom line is scary. everytime i see a guy now.. all i can think of is their brain and the word "SEX" and "VISUAL STIMULUS" imprinted on it.. aka how our gube magazine drew it. i'ts a good excuse to go lesbian. at least i'll know my partner is feeling REal affection for me.LOL well hH.. wat you said is true.. "guys Are visual creatures."

but on the serious side, I suppose that lecture juz helps reinforce the fact mebbe it's better to be single ( or gay)

juz had buddhist class just now. was taught about symbolisms. The flowers we offer symbolises impermance. Shen Lao Bing Si. nothing is permanent. It reminds us how not become too attached to this world. No point dwelling on something that you'll never have. greed is one of the poisons in this life. Anger arises from not being able to get what you want. Making use of my life to cultivate myself should be my aim..
During class, reverend also pointed out that the blossom was juz as beautiful no matter which angle it was being appreciated from. that was to remind us that regardless of wheter our efforts elicit praise or criticism, we should not give up and we should keep blooming to our full potential. Made me feel ashamed of the many times i gave up because someone said a harsh word about my efforts. eg. friday's pbl.
Hai.. felt very peaceful after buddhist discussion class..feel very sad can't go for the sangha offering tomolo.. it looks awesome this year.. :( .

Philips island and ze weekend.


Hey PPLZ photographs are UP. go to the link and then go to sydney trip 2. ( too lazy to open a new album) pix or me at philips island tour and aiai's bday are up.

NEway, signed up for the philips island tour. barely a medknob year 2 in sight. besides me, kenneth, edison, and wanyen. Got introed to qh's frens.. pretty wacky ppl :) had fun with 'em. the trip was a bit erm.. boring initially. we didn't cover a lot of places on teh itinery.. ( cheat my moneY) but had a good time yakking ont eh bus with qh , we were discussing human nature.. :P was asking her opinion about the orbitofrontal cortex and it's suppression of inapprop behaviour. so you mean to say that humans are wired to do inappropriate stuff ( like pulling ponytails or lifting up skirts) and that an area of the brain stops us from doing these things.. qh pointed out that we coudln't really define " appropriate behaviour " . ti's just a set of rules we came up with . how true.. haha.

the penguins were cute.. we waited quite long tho'.. saw a few grps then we went walking along teh boardwalk, peering thru ppl's legs to get a glimpse of the penguin ( no. we were NOT looking up ppl's skirts) . the penguin's looked quite bemused as they waddled up to theri nest, under the curious gazes off the excited crowd.



sunday.
surprise for aia's bday backfired... coz of maggie's dearest "3" phone . sigh. we really have to plan better. we arrived late, and then bleah.. almost got to surprise her, until the phone came into the pic. :) nic baked an awesome cake ( see photos) it was better than the mango cake in crown!!! j9 was coming up with ways to market it.. haha.. neway, chatted with them for while, then we all had to go off. missed the tram, so walked back instead. wasted the whol eafternoon on essay. wanted to rewrite wat i wrote yesterday coz i realised i wasn't answering the question. GROAN. haven't done any studying . so gonna die for test. someone stop me from reaching for baobei.. otherwise i'm screwed for sure. Ahhhhhhhh... But the new song j9 made me listen to is SO NICE> it's called closest thing to crazy.. juz got the chords for it, i am soooo gonna reach for baobei and start belting it out again ( which sounds bad coz i've a sorethroat ) nonono.. muz... resist .. temptation...

I know i haven't blogged for a while. there's a lot to tell ppls, lotsa tell. the last time i tried bloggin the computer lost my entry. so here's a very very quickie summary of wat has happened.


3 weeks ago

Vannessa's 21st party. Geez. i nearly wore jeans. i mean the invite card said 'semi formal" lucky lizhen and i decided to wear proper party clothes in the end coz when we got there.. everyone was SUPER formal. the jacket, the ties , the tube dresses, the WORKS. omg. Neway, i felt kinda weird. felt as though i was liek 10 years old again, when i was at xmas parties, watching grownups all dolled up, mingling, sipping their drinks, chatting in groups. except now i was doing the all those things. FREAKY. i'm getting old. neway, the food was FANTASTIC. there was speeches, performance by Vanessa's relatives and 21 birthday gifts., an awesome 3 tier cake with sparklers for candles. Someone swapped my punch for an alcoholic one tho. Got back quite late. it was a huge partee.. so many ppl going. when me and nat got down to the city, where i met lizhen and char, there was SO many pple going in that direction. ran into a couple of fac mates, and tons more other ppl. wowz. never seen such a huge party in my life. seriously. it was quite an experience.

Week 4.

This week was utterly crap. i was having a severe lack of sleep and severe stress. lectures were awful. erica was awful. i mean, nice lady, but whoa.. she can't lecture man, or the material was darn abstract. *scream* thurs and friday was probably the worst day me and lizhen had ever had. her bag was stolen, right outside the brownless biomed lib. I ran into her after pract and instead of going to buy a cake for wanyen, like we should haver been, i excitedly told her that erica had juz explained to me the visual pathway and suggested that we go into the lib to discuss it. bad idea


SHe popped her bag next to me and went to the notice board. then this dishevelled guy approached me and asked me for the time. I was quite puzzled coz he didn't look like a student. but i told him the time. and that's when it happened. lz and i aren't sure but we think another guy who was sitted on the bench took her bag and ran for it while i was distracted. We didn't notice anything. we talked about the visual pathway for 5 minutes more ( oh the irony of all things) and then decided to go get wy's cake. ANd then, we coudln't find her bag. omg. the shock and teh horror of it all. Watever i was feeling at the mmt, lz was getting it 100 times worst. We ran out and tried to look for the thieves ( me with kandel and a book in tow) i lost sight of lizhen but found nic and char. we finally caught sight of her with a secuirity guard. the unsympathetic asshole was giving her a lecture instead of helping her. neway, off to the secuirty post to make a report. the guy there was much kinder. he told us wat to do . we made off to carlton police post where we met ass hole no. 2. the policeman was making all sorts of inappropriate jokes about lizhen losing her bag and he didn't even take details. MY GOODNESS. Fuck him man. here lz was so upset already and he was'nt even empathic. some lesion in his basal ganglia or prefrontal lobe. i swear. lizhen and i ran arnd the campus and gratten street trying to find her bag in the dustbins. j9 and tony came along too. then lizhen got a call, from aiai saying that someone had called claiming to be the police and saying that they had found her bag. it sounded dodgey. we were scared coz lizhen's keys and her address were in the bag too. so we expected a break in. neway, lizhen managed to confirm that it really was the police. whew.

the fuckin thieves took her h/p and her cards and cash. ASSHOLES. DAMN THEM man. why the fuck do they wanna coz so much emotional distress to a student? We are students, for goodness sakes. like how much do we have? we don't even earn. FUCK them man. they took her wallet, caused us so much distress, ruined wy's birthday.. SHIT.


friday the 13th. was in the pract.. received a call from zhen, she had foudn teh housedoor open when she got home. we were frightened that there was a break in so i suggested she inform the police. Meantime, me and nic rushed to her house. Well, lz was quite upset.. because of the police ( again) well, welcome to the real world. one full of assholes. the policelady whom lizhen called accused her of being paranoid and refused to help. WELL HELLLO.. no wonder the mafia is so damn rampant here. the police just dont' care. Argh.

neway, weekend was sucky. i think somewhere in the midst of being stressed, sleeping 4 hours a night for the whole week and desperately trying to catch up with my work, plus all the shit that happened, and walking in teh rain.. i caught the flu.

sat was a windy and blisteringly rainy day. walked int eh rain again to go market. and yez. that's when that did it. spent sat in bed,couldn't breath. my nose was so clogged up. had to miss wanyen's bday. felt really really bad. hai. neway, too sick to be productive had to miss youth group and lecture. The ppl at the temple are so sweet. sq offered to come down in the rain to my house and pass me a bottle of blessed water from teh ceremony. i was so touched. they're such bodhisattvas. talked to reverend on the phone and told her wat had happened. sigh.

neway, other nice thin gin week 4 was we had 2 guest for Hand S lecutre. one schizophrenic and one was a gal whoes sister had schizophrenia. it was very moving and enlightening having them talk to us.. the gal broke down at one point. i kinda wonder .. is teh disease worst for the pt and the caretaker? both ppl were very very brave. hai.. we always study about the biological part, we often 4get about the ppl... and these accounts reminded me once again of the fragility of the human body and mind..


Week 5.

have a crush on my anat tutor.. whoo hoo. but wat's new. have a crush on anat tutors every semester. john beer was juz so sweet ( and unfortunatley, very much married too) , damien was juz plain hot, raoul was sooo funny and cute ( lizhen vehemently agrees :P ).. well no diffy. come to think of it, lizhen pointed out that our anat lectures are crushworthy too.. craig is the epitome of coolness, jenny is hot, norm is eccentrically sweet, ivi is SWOON. ( oh the cute accent, ) seriously, you see al lthe gals perking up in his lecture, tho'. he's not fantastic, it's pure eye candy. wat a hot bod. ok.. can't fit chris anywhere thought. whoopz.

overall, tiring week again. motor pathway is bad.. worst than visual in some ways.. so much to memo. groan. dunno wat was goin on in pbl. went shopping with lizhen on friday. today going to philips island. SCREAM. i wish i didn't sign up for it.. haven't finished assignment or studying >> ARGHHHHH